Episode 221: Facing Reality with a Positive Mindset

Do you feel out of control as if the day’s events have flung you in a whirlwind? In this episode, Lori and Jimmy discuss the current events facing families in our communities, states and nation. Solutions to dealing with these overwhelming events are shared in a positive mindset.  

Episode Keys:

  • How you can help others understand the impact of worldly events on their life and face it with confidence.
  • Why it is critical that you maintain perspective in light of negative events.
  • When you should consider helping others that may be in more dire circumstances than you currently find yourself. Hint: All the time!
  • How you can help heal the country and regain unity by utilizing a philosophy of “agreeing to disagree” without physical impact to your fellow man.
  • What to do to keep your mindset in a positive mode!

Podcast Transcript

JW: Good morning everyone. This is Jimmy Williams and I have with me today, and I’m honored to say the name, my co-host with the most, Lori Few. How we doing, Lori? LF: I’m back! JW: You know, folks, she may hide, but she can’t hide anywhere. I can’t find her. So I located her down and it only took a couple appearances before the judge to get her a little bit of time off. But hey, , that’s, that’s terrible . But Lori, it, it is an honor. I know you’ve been busy. We’re gonna talk about things today, Lori, that we’ve never even talked about the topics anyway, on our broadcast here. So we’re gonna share today on this podcast some special areas that Lori and I may discuss in our own personal lives may discuss off the air, so to speak. But today, you know what? Here at Live Life by Design, we live in the real world, wouldn’t you say? LF: I would say that it’s very real at this juncture. Yes. JW: Folks, you don’t even know. And she doesn’t know what I’m gonna be asking, but I’m gonna be asking some questions on current topics and affairs in our world, because, you know, it is one thing to fool ourselves saying, well, we can just build our own world, and we do it. Live a Life By Design, help you create what you want as your safe space, create what you want in your career, how you want outcomes to be but sometimes there are some things you just gotta work through. And so today I’m gonna bring up some of these current topics, and Lori is gonna answer all the hard questions. LF: Oh my goodness. All the hard questions. Oh, well, I don’t know that was ready for that. JW: He is geared up, folks. The trigger is ready to be pulled for these hard questions. This is a speed round, if you will, here on Live a Life By Design. But hey, real quickly before we do this, go to our Facebook community page at Live a Life By Design Community, and give us some of your concerns after you listen to this podcast about some of the topics we brought up, and maybe even some of the suggestions you could help us solving the concerns and issues in our local communities that we are facing, maybe of some help to others that may be facing similar situations in other states or countries. So, Lori, first thing off the bat, I’ve just gotta ask you work for a public school system here in Oklahoma. Tell me what are some of the challenges? What are some of the good things that’s happened as we start off this school year? And we just literally, I believe, got it started. LF: Oh, we did get it started. And, you know, I love Back to school, back to school for me is like, it’s, it’s like Christmas. It’s, it’s new. It’s exciting, it’s unexpected. You know, you, you think that you’re on , you think you’re on the nice list to, you know, to, to wake up one morning and find out that Oh, yes. In fact, all my efforts are still, you know, I mean, I’m still in good graces, but I love back to school. I don’t know, there’s something in the air in August. This August, obviously the air is filled with a thousand degrees worth of heat. And that’s okay. But that’s kind of how you know that it’s back to school in Oklahoma. It’s hot and, and you know, it, it just, it is what it is. But this year, so much excitement. LF: We actually opened a new school facility this year and a new activity center, and it’s been just so exciting to see all of the new faces that have come into the building and that are so excited to be there and just take it all in. It’s, I mean, it’s kind of like a new car or a new house or a new backpack. Anything that’s shiny and new, you just kind of wanna take care of it and, you know, look at it and touch it and feel it, and all those fun things. So it’s been, gosh, it’s been an amazing experience. Now, not to say that we haven’t had our hiccups because in building this new facility, it allowed us to be able to go to grade level centers to have collaboration amongst all of our grade levels. And so that really created a sense of urgency. LF: Over the summer, all of our maintenance staff worked tirelessly along with some really exceptional community groups to be able to help us move all of our teachers into different buildings and different locations. And so we were able to do that and just, you know, a sense of new, a sense of everybody kind of being new for the first time altogether. New places, new faces, new locations, and, you know, that doesn’t come without growing pains. You know, first days of school, everybody trying to figure it out, who needs to be where and what works and what isn’t working. And so I, you know, took a lot of phone calls the first week of school and I had the opportunity to talk to a lot of people and get their feedback. But my favorite thing was that I just kept telling everybody, PYP. JW: Uh, PYP? That’s a new one for me. LF: No, it’s not Jimmy. You of all people know what PYP is that you just, you’re not in the right context. Okay. What do they tell you when you go to the airport? Pack your patience. JW: Yes. Yes, thank you. LF: I just, I just told everybody PYP, and we smile and we pivot and we move on and we try to do our best. And so, and it’s been great. The community’s been wonderful. Everybody has been so supportive and so excited. And it’s, it, it is a stressful time. I will not lie. School pickup lines are- JW: Chaos. LF: That it is. But it’s better. And everybody’s settling and we’re having a fantastic school year and we are so excited to be able to do some awesome things this year. So. JW: Lori, I’ve just gotta tell you, I flashed back to the eighties apparently with that, that p y p I thought it was party at your place, so I didn’t know what No, no, no, no. Okay. LF: No, we’re not part, well, I mean, we do wanna have some celebrations this year, but not that type of party. JW: Oh, okay. Well, yes, of course not. Yes, I only showed up ’cause I was so poor as a student. I got something to eat for free, you know how that goes. But anyway, yes, I remember those days. So, so real quickly, and I only want to ask this ’cause this is on the cutting edge of everyone’s mind. We got this brand new activity center. I mean, we’ve got volleyball, basketball. We got wrestling. Wrestling. Yeah. Is there something else in there that we’re doing? I can’t remember. I think that’s it. Oh goodness. Yeah. but here’s the thing. Has anyone got blood on the new floor yet from the volleyball games? LF: I don’t think so. Thank you. You’ve just jinxed it. We’re gonna bring a host of volleyball, so there it is. I mean- JW: Oh yeah. And I think that’s coming up here in a few days. And so- LF: Jimmy has now willed into the universe. Great. Okay. JW: All I ask is if they’re gonna drip that stuff, all that hazard material all over our new floor, please bring your own wipes, get that stuff cleaned up and get your own, what is it that has hazmat spray? Get it out. LF: Yep. Yep. JW: No. Oh, and take care of the kid too. Take care of the kids. Know whatever, for sure. But get that floor cleaned up first. You know, I can see our administration going, Hey, we got a brand new building, let’s keep this thing clean. You know, and the kids are, first thing they’re going, Hey, I can put be the first one to put my name on the wall or something. You know, I can just see this happening. Yeah, yeah. LF: No, hopefully not. Hopefully everybody is gonna be respectful and, and really take care of the facility because it is awesome. It is incredibly beautiful. It’s amazing. And it’s so awesome to be able to have that to, you know, our community really invested in us. They believed in us, they supported us, and they wanted that for their kids and for future generations. And so that’s what is really, really important. And that’s what I love about our community, is that it’s a sense of cohesiveness. It’s a sense of being together and being on the same page and giving everybody a great opportunity to have, you know, new things, to be able to excel and to get better and better. JW: You know? And one of the great opportunities that we have to serve our community, Live a Life By Design capital management, is that we help award a younger teacher, I would say one that’s not quite been around 20 years or so with a thousand dollars check, basically. Yes. To help get their classroom outfitted. And I know you assisted this year in, in my absence of helping grant that to a wonderful teacher who, who needed it and deserved it. And that has always been a wonderful blessing for us to be a part of the school system in that manner. But I gotta ask you a tough question now, though. So we’re talking about schools and education, all that comes through funding that comes through policies and so forth. But what about this presidential campaign coming up? How, how’s it? Well, you’re probably not even old enough to vote. Are you old enough to vote? I mean, you’re, you’re awfully young looking, Lori, so I didn’t know. You’re so funny. LF: . Yes, I’m old enough to vote. I’m the very first president presidential election I voted in, was I believe it was Clinton and someone else. I can’t think Clinton’s first term, whoever he ran against. That’s the first time I’ve- JW: Well, he ran against George Herbert Walker Bush, remember? Well, you’re not that old, kiddo LF: I just remember that was the name on the ballot. JW: Yeah. I gotta tell you though this is the first time in the history of this country. ’cause I did the research. I want you to know, I’m a, I’m a, I’m really one of these kind of self-imposed professional historians. I just love history, you know? And so I did the research and seriously, did you know, we’ll be voting for basically octogenarians. This continues to go. And I’m sitting there looking at this and I’m going, no you know, a a country of over 300 million people, surely, surely there’s some young people like JFK for example, that could come in, in their forties that could help move the needle and move our country forward for all people. You know, I’m not picking a side here today. I’m not trying to debate anything, I’m just telling you it’s a first time that’s ever happened. How would you feel about voting for one of these two primary individuals that could be octogenarians by the time it gets there? LF: I just, I, I think age is obviously a factor. And it creates the sense of possible instability if something were to happen to a, you know, a sitting president we’ve had that happen in this country before. Not because of, you know, age, but because of assassination, basically. I think the young people are out there. I I do, I think that we as older adults should be the ones providing opportunities for them to experience government in a positive way, even if it’s on a local level. If it’s serving on a community board or a volunteer organization or city council or something like that. I think that that’s where we need to be sending young people, giving them those experiences to say, yes, your voice matters. Yes, you have a say. And what you are interested in can be impactful. And that just leads to bigger and better things. And so I think it’s our job to cultivate this sense of yes, you can, this is why you should, and maybe we should be taking on more roles of leading that example for them to say, you’re ne you know, you’re never too young. I mean, what is the rule? You have to be 35 to run for president. JW: 35. Yeah. LF: Yeah. I, I think they’re out there. I think that they are out changing the world in big ways in their own, you know, lanes. But we just need to be able to say, Hey, it, it politics right now is so dis it’s, it’s divisive. And so if we can give people a sense of cohesiveness, and that’s one of the reasons I love this podcast is ’cause we talk a lot about positivity and how to be, you know, involved in your community and bring people together to do great things. And I think if we’re setting that example and leading that for the younger people in all aspects, including government, they’re out there. They just need to know that they can do it and it can be a good thing. JW: So what you’re telling me, these two primary gentlemen that faced each other in, in 2020, for example, if 35 was the age you minimum age, you had to be under our constitution to run for president, would they be twice qualified? I mean, they’re way, they’re way over. LF: Maybe almost triple qualified in age. JW: I’m just picking on ’em a little bit. You know, here at Live a Life By Design, we don’t tell you who to vote for. We just ask you go out and exercise that beautiful, wonderful right that we have under our constitution in this United States to go vote. Just go register, go vote, express yourself. Be a part, as Lori said, in your local community, your state and your nation. Get out and vote. And you know, I’m a little bit appalled of how low the turnout has been up until this last election for for the presidency. It’s, it’s just not been the turnout for our country. If you look at registered voters, I think it’s something like maybe 20 something percent us all that vote. LF: Well. And I think that that’s the, another big thing is that young people need to understand that voting is not just a presidential election every four years. Voting is something that school board members, city councilman, county commissioner, all these things that, you know, impact a local community is where it gets started. And, and again, as adults, we have to set that example. I, we’ve been taking our son, he’s 14, but we’ve been taking him with us to vote. Our local county election board is so gracious. I think they thought the first time I I did it, I thought, well, they, they may not allow this. I didn’t know what the rules were, but Noah was four years old. And I, I said, come on, we’re we’re gonna go vote. And of course, the the biggest thing and the biggest takeaway that he got outta that was getting a sticker that said, I voted even though he didn’t. LF: But they were so kind and so gracious. And I’ll never forget that experience of those employees letting him be part of that process. And so now he knows, we talk a lot about it. He knows he’s gone several times. And it’s great because now we print off, you know, sample ballots and we sit down and we talk about it. And as a family, we, you know, look at all the sides and we research all the people and we, you know, try to make the best informed decisions that we can. And I think as adults, if we continue to set that example for our young people, they, again, it’s, it’s about we have so much going on in our adult lives, but we have such a responsibility to the young people that we impact and that we are around, that we’ve got to start stepping up and making a more concerted effort to make sure that they know how important these future things that they’re gonna get to do and how important those are. JW: Oh. Absolutely. A hundred percent agree. And I will tell you, it’s just all about engagement. Yes. And the one way you get them engaged is get them to learn quickly the importance of their role in the future of this country, in this state and in our community. For example, like you said, grassroots man, get it down there. I will want you to know, in our local community, I have been on the leadership side of anytime we didn’t get stickers. So for example, the state of Oklahoma won’t give you, you’re laughing, but I do every election. I think you should have stickers. Yes. Because what it does is I wear that to the coffee shop to lunch that day, whoever, and they go, oh, oh, I gotta go vote before seven 7:00 PM our time folks here in the Central United States. And, and I’ll call Ms. Barnes as soon as I get through voting. JW: I’m typically the first to the 10th person there. I get there usually right at seven, but there’s always these guys that get there ahead of me. Seems like, so this year, any election, I’m gonna try to get there at six 30 and I’m bringing all of the precinct workers a sausage biscuit or something. Right. Okay. There you go. But here’s my point. I go I get those. And she goes, Jimmy, you know this, we tell you every time we can’t give you the sticker unless it’s a general election. And I said, well, I don’t think that’s right. So I’m just voicing my opinion. And it’s so funny, I go in and cast my ballot and they can recite what I tell ’em. Every time I go in, you’re gonna laugh. I have this speech, as you can only imagine, Lori, I have this speech, and they hand me my ballot and I get ready to put it in the voting machine. JW: I say, I hereby as a citizen of the great state of the United States or the great country of the United States and the great state of Oklahoma do discharge my duty and responsibility and cast my ballot. And I put it in there. Love it. And you can just see these precinct judges, their lips are going about the same time no voice coming out . It’s kinda like they’re lip syncing . They go, you’re the only one Jimmy that has a speech before you cast a ballot. And I said, that’s the uniqueness of our country. I can be me. Right. LF: That’s right. JW: Now let’s talk about, let’s talk about a couple of things though. In this great country, , what in the world’s going on? So let’s talk about how can we pull ourselves back together and be one great solidified country on behalf of the country, but still have different backgrounds? What’s your thought about that? LF: You know, it goes back to… it’s hard. It’s really hard. And I say this and people laugh at me all the time. They’re like, oh, you’re that, you know, that’s just such a canned answer. But agree to disagree and just be accepting of different people’s opinions. We don’t have to argue about it. We don’t have to knock, knock down drag, you know, knock down, drag out, fight or whatever. Just say, you know what? That I, I, I hear you. I see you. It’s a valid, you know, your point is valid. I may not agree with you, but it’s okay. It’s what makes it a great democracy. We’re able to have those conversations and accept each other and go down the, the street, and then we see each other in the grocery store buying the same type of bread or ice cream. There’s, I mean, there are other ways to unify people. It’s just, I, I know that sounds, you know, corny and canned, but it’s so true. Just agree to disagree and still be, I mean, you could still be kind to people that you don’t necessarily see eye to eye with, and we’re not gonna see eye to eye with everybody on every single thing. JW: No, I agree. And you know, here’s the thing too. I’ve often found that it gets our attention when I go up to someone like you, Lori, and I’d say, Hey, you know, I think it’s great. Vote your conscience even when you’re wrong. Yes. And so that’s what I tell ’em. I’m just kidding. I’m just kidding. You should see the look on their eyes. What do you mean wrong? Boy, they’ll stand on their platform, whatever that is. , you know, I think you should sell cabbage on the side of the road and no sales tax. Okay. Whatever pal you do, you, okay. That’s what I’m saying here. LF: That’s feel about coffee. When I see people order cold, cold, like cold coffee, I’m like, what is wrong with you? Coffee is not supposed to be cold. JW: To me. It’s an oxymoron that’s not yet been registered in the dictionary, but you know, it should be there. Cold coffee should not even be in two words to put together. You know what I mean? LF: And I, I put my money where my mouth is. I’ve tried it. I don’t like it. No offense to anyone who does love cold brew or cold coffee or Frappuccino. I just love my coffee so hot, it burns my tongue. Like I just- JW: Oh my goodness. LF: And I order it extra hot. And I know the legal limit is 180 degrees. JW: Wow. You’ve done your research. LF: I’ve done my research. JW: Now listen I do know I read a, a a case and if you would go to McDonald’s, you can probably win you a couple million bucks. But oh, if you put the hot coffee with a lid barely attached between your legs and hit speed bumps, I think you get a lot of money. But that’s what I read. LF: Well, no. JW: Yeah. And it would be more than 180 degree. It would burn pretty good, I’m sure. But let me tell you, there’s one great use though for cold coffee, and it’s a medicinal use. And I’m not trying to get too, too graphic here, but they use these for treatments of certain issues of the lower bowel. I’ll leave it with that. They, they, they don’t drink it. It goes in another route. Oh. And it’s cold coffee. And something about the caffeine, the coffee grounds, I don’t know what it is, but they use that to treat early problems of maybe irregularities of the, of the bowel and the colon and stuff. And so that’s why when I tell people, you may not wanna order that cold coffee, you don’t know what it’s used for. My daughter still orders the cold coffee with, with the sweet cream cold brew and all that. LF: You didn’t even know this morning when you woke up and tuned in that this was going to be your morning and this is what you were going to learn. JW: Yes. I guarantee you anyone listens to this on their way to the coffee shop is going, Hey, gimme the hottest coffee you got, pal. I don’t want a cold coffee. All right. That is funny. Funny. Well, hey, you know, we’ve tackled the, the big presidency issue, just the key thing there, folks, get out, go vote, get registered, do the right thing, exercise your, your right, but also your responsibility, as I always tell people, it’s not just a right, it’s a responsibility to choose your leaders for the next four years. Let’s talk a little bit though about one of the nearest dear dearest and dearest things to my heart is the cost of life right now. And I’m talking about it from the standpoint of our families. You know, there’s families of four right now, and I’m not laying blame on anybody, I’m just telling you a facts. JW: So in my world, as a wealth advisor, we deal with inflation all the time. Now you’ll see that there’s only 3%, 3.1% now of inflation on as the you know, the government counts inflation and, and calculates it without food or without gasoline and some other things. But what I want you to do is focus on people don’t get by without food, and people don’t get by without gasoline. So the, what I call the real effect of this inflation, it’s costing us families of four, about another five to $7,000 a year. Wow. Just to live the way they did last year. LF: Goodness, I hadn’t even, I hadn’t thought about it in that perspective about, I mean, obviously we have felt that, I think everyone has felt that, that every time you go to the store, you go to the pump, it is more expensive. And so people are having to make, you know, more concerted effort about their choices. Like what, you know, maybe not going out to eat as much, or maybe not taking that extra trip to the movie theater, but five to 7,000. Wow. JW: Yeah. And so, if you’ve got a family of four and two parents, now here’s the other bad news with that other shoot of fault. And here at Live a Life By Design folks, we told you we’re gonna be real today, the wage growth has not maintained its growth of excess, of the inflation rate right now. So what we’re seeing is a lot of families getting pinched. And that, that’s a shame. And in my opinion so what we’re also seeing is a lot of families that are already on that bubble, especially in our local community, we have a, a company called Shared Blessings that hands out backpacks for the weekend. You’re very familiar. You’ve, you’ve volunteered for them. I know stuff. LF: Fantastic organization. JW: Yes. Yes. Well, anyway, they they’re telling me their, their interim executive directors telling me that they’ve had more requests for backpacks this year than they even did in the last two years. Yeah. So there’s a trend. What do you make of that? LF: You know, I think there is a definite need. And that’s the reality. And, and we at school benefits so greatly from Shared Blessings than other organizations that just, they don’t ever say no. I mean, they will do whatever it takes to try to meet a need for someone and a family especially. But I, I could see this, you know, with the wage gap in inflation, some people that have never had to turn to ask for that kind of help before are now having to make that call. And, you know, and for a lot of people it can be very you know, prideful. People don’t want to ask for help, or people don’t think that that’s the kind of help that they would need or qualify for. But the reality is, is that we have people that have those needs because they’re having to make decisions about healthcare or, you know, living paycheck to paycheck. And if you have an unexpected medical emergency or a car repair, or you know, an unexpected doctor’s visit, one thing like that can really send someone into a situation where they may not be able to come back out of it for a while. It could be very detrimental to a family. JW: I don’t have the site for this other than to say the vice president mentioned this once in her, some, some of her comments. And she said that a lot of families in the United States are only $500 emergency bill that lands unexpectedly away from bankruptcy, 500 bucks. And I know that may seem like a very few dollars to some of us, but to some of those families that are struggling right now, it’s all the money in the world, right? And so, let’s don’t forget our communities our listeners out there. You know, I always say it this way, pay it forward. And don’t, you know, the the greatest thing in life you can do, and the most joy you get outta life is when you do something for someone who doesn’t expect it. And you don’t expect to be repaid. I mean, just do it for your kindness. JW: You’ve been given an abundance in life. Sharing that abundance is what I say. I always have to end this show on a positive, Lori. ’cause You know, it’s just me and our communities are hurting right now. Now we at Live Life by Design also contribute and support our communities in many ways out in her locally. And we ask you to do the same. So I want you to pick out a student this year. If you see students suffering, if you have a teacher that, you know, needs help in her classroom, getting the right materials or supplies together, I don’t care if it’s just simply buying Kleenexes, Lori, whatever. ’cause Those kids all have runny noses, no matter the season. LF: No matter the season. That is true. One of the other things too, Jimmy, that I want people to realize as we’re on this topic, you know, financially, you know, doing contributions and donations are great, but the other thing that people really, really need right now is words of positive affirmation. You know, I got a card recently in the mail that just, you know, after a hard first week of school, someone dropped me a note that said, you know, we appreciate all your efforts. We know that it, you know, didn’t necessarily go exactly the plan this week, but we appreciate your continued efforts. And so sometimes just an email, just drop somebody a note, a sticky note. Even it, it doesn’t cost anything, but it means the world to people. Just that affirmation of, I see you, I know what you’re going through. I appreciate what you’re doing. And although it may not be the way you intended it, keep trying. And so if, if I could leave everybody with that this morning on a positive, that would be my positive. Tell people how you feel. Life is short. You never know. And it doesn’t take but five minutes just to tell somebody how you feel or just to say thank you, or, Hey, keep going. Keep trying. JW: Oh, I love it. Jim Rohn, one of my great mentors, always had a statement that said, the only time you realize failure is when you quit trying to succeed. Trying. Yeah, that’s true. So that’s true. I love those words. Great thoughts. So true. Hey, Lori end our show for us here. Those are great comments. And we look forward to everyone, kind of, this is not the newest of formats. We’re just trying something different here. And we hope you like what we’re doing. If not, please go to our Facebook page, let us know your thoughts and go to our website for Live a Life By Design and let us know your thoughts there. Lori, thank you for joining me today, and I’ll let you close out this episode. LF: Well, I will tell you, it’s still hot in Oklahoma, so if you are gonna send any good thing into the universe, how about some cooler weather? Fall is coming. Football season is upon us. For everybody who’s excited for that, we’re excited. Drop us a note. Let us know what you think about the show and continue to do great things in your community and in your world. And you know what, what we always say, Jimmy, go out- JW: Live a life by design! Have a great week everyone!

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