Do you ever wish you could change the world in a powerfully positive manner? You can! In this episode, Lori and Jimmy share strategies and ideas to help you become the change agent you wish to be.
Episode Keys:
- Why it is important to show up each day as your best you!
- How your philosophy of life can be enhanced to create a following in life.
- Who you allow in your life may be the catalyst to reaching your highest goals.
- When to utilize the L.I.V.E. approach to increase your motivation.
- How journaling may help you maintain a growth attitude to become bigger, better and bolder!
Podcast Transcript
JW:
This today is gonna be a monumental podcast, my friends. Hey, thanks for listening. Here at Live a Life By Design, Lori Few and I like to do what we do best, and that is to bring you straight from the heart, the core of and fiber of our every being what we believe to be the best information to help you live life in a manner you wish you know, live Life By Design podcast with some brainchild we came up with about how we endeavor each day to live our lives in the way we desire. And we wanna pass some of that out to our friends, cuz you know today’s episodes about changing the world. And we’re gonna share with you some ideas, strategies, and so forth of how we go about trying to change and accomplish change in our world. Our only goal in this podcast is to help our listeners and subscribers live a bigger, better, and bolder life in the manner that they design. The challenge for us is immense. We receive comments from many of you, how we stir a change in your life or cause a fire to grow from a smoldering ash that inspires you to reach greater heights in life. The strategies we share today are not novel. This isn’t something we just dreamed up, but rather unique in how you apply them to achieve the results you desire. So are you making the impact you desire in your world? Today, we’re going to share some of our favorite strategies to help you, our valued listeners, change the world. And we mean that sincerely. So before you think, I can’t do this or I love this one, are you crazy? Let me explain what I mean by change the world. Many of us have lived a life of mediocrity by our choices and our mindset today though is a new day. Be listening to this podcast episode, you will be changed as a person in a manner that empowers you to try new ideas and seek greater outcomes for your life. And the reason I know is because my co-host I’m about to introduce inspires me every day to show up with my best game because she’s so much more talented than me. Hey, Lori Few! Welcome to the show.
LF:
Oh my goodness. What a big intro to live up to. My goodness. Thank you, Jimmy. Uh, good morning. Woo. Um, nothing like taking on the, the biggest challenge of changing the world. I mean, that’s a very big task and I’m just, I don’t know, I’m already kind of feeling a little overwhelmed. I don’t know how we’re gonna get this done, but we’re gonna try because that’s what we do. We try.
JW:
That’s it.
LF:
We’re not gonna, we can’t give up at the very beginning. So, um, my goodness. Wow. Changing the world. That’s, that’s a deep topic, but we need to try to explain to our listeners what we mean by changing the world. So kind of let’s break that down to Jimmy and I, it’s critical that we start the change within our family. We start it within your four walls, or if you have more walls, if you have a bigger space. But we’re working,
JW:
I have four walls called a dorm in college, and that was all I had. Four walls. Exactly. I digress. Yeah.
LF:
My, yeah, your first home. And, and you think about that like with your family, where you started and if you’ve expanded your family or if you’ve moved or if you’ve grown or you know, you’ve changed. But we seek to be better parents, better mates, better spouses, better kids. If you have kids or you remember at one time when you were a child.
JW:
Or could we, can you change kids by trading them though? Can you trade some with your neighbor?
LF:
Oh, I don’t, wouldn’t that be cool? I think, I think my neighbors would be very upset with me right now. , I don’t think that’s a fair trade to trade a teenager.
JW:
Oh, well that’s true. That’s true. I’ll trade one for a kitty cat or a puppy dog. Maybe get something. Yes. You know what I mean? Yeah. Something that’ll, that’ll obey, you know? Yes.
LF:
Yeah. Yes. , we like to say it’s a phase, but yeah. We’ll, we’ll we’ll get to that. But by changing our mindset and our philosophy at the most basic level of life, we set ourselves up for greater impact to the world around us. What are you doing to become a more supportive person, a friend, a spouse, a mate? How are you supporting those in your office environment? How are you supporting those in your community? We seek to gain a better understanding. And if anyone has any tips about how to survive the teenage years, please feel free to drop them in the comments.
JW:
Oh, that’s a great one there. Yeah. Just, uh, reply back in the comments or at our Facebook page and Lori will be glad to read those. Hey, you know, this is a great, great idea, Lori. So when we start with our family now, I didn’t say I was going to change my wife, right? I didn’t say I was gonna change my children. I needed to change one person that had direct control of my mind and that’s me. So I did, let me tell you, I, um, have two daughters. And the reason I have two daughters, Lori, is because, well, I have two daughters, . And so, you know, you after a while you go, this just didn’t working for us, so I’m gonna quit after two. Right?
LF:
Oh, you’re braver than I am.
JW:
I am. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, Lori, now listen, I don’t know about bravery, but, uh, anyway, uh, I will say this though, it is so, um, challenging sometimes as parents in the crazy world we live and the, uh, you know, the social media thing and all that challenge that we didn’t really have a lot of with our older daughter that we, we did see a lot of with our younger daughter, was totally a curve ball to Dina and I. And the one thing we did is we stressed, here’s one important word, honesty, uh, because I’m not a mind reader and my great co-host is though, but she’s an all empowered woman and she does these things, but we men just cannot read minds. Now we do read body language. Like for example, when I do something wrong, Dina’s got arms crossed. Usually they browse a little fur and down and sometimes the chin’s a little lower closer to, to her, her, uh, chest area.
JW:
So she’s just kinda looking down. That usually tells me I need to probably ask for permission to go to my room and think about what I’ve done. But, uh, anyway, uh, I wanna be a better spouse or be a better father and so forth. So what I did, I implemented years ago with our children, the honesty feature. So dad doesn’t understand if you don’t explain it, but you gotta be calm and be honest and explain it and dad gets it right. Because I will tell you, if you men out there agree with this, I’d like some comments in this, in the commentary section. Uh, we really don’t know anything about women. I’m just gonna tell you now, I’ve been married 35 years and I’m still trying to figure out women. And Lori, that’s not a slight, I just think that God laughs when we, he looks down on us and he goes, yeah, let’s see if they can figure this out. And we men try to understand women. I I just don’t know how that works.
LF:
Well, that, you know, the statement is God’s has a sense of humor. I definitely agree.
JW:
Yes. I I agree totally. So, so we gotta start with our families and I think honesty’s a good one. What do you, what do you think, Lord, what’s another means of helping to improve the family that you can think of?
LF:
Well, I think it goes back to being honest. Um, you know, that is to, communication is great, but I, I definitely agree with being honest. Um, for those of you that are, um, television fans or streaming, I realize most people do streaming. Now, not very many people do television, but however –
JW:
You’re so high tech, you know that?
LF:
However you get your information, um, for those of you that understand and know anything about the show, Ted Lasso, it’s on Apple tv and it’s about American, um, football coach who moves to England to take a job, uh, coaching the real football, aka as we call it, soccer. Um, but there’s a, a character by the name of Ted Lasso. And the, the show chronicles his positive attitude and mindset regardless of the situation. But there’s, um, a scene or two with his in the first season with his wife, and they’re going through some things and they create this environment of when they are talking to each other and they believe one of the other is not being a hundred percent truthful or honest. Um, their word is Oklahoma. And when one of them says the word Oklahoma, it basically calls the other one out and they have to be a hundred and, you know, 10 or 115% honest about whatever it is that’s bothering them.
LF:
And so, you know, we art imitates life and we take some liberties in our own lives to emulate some of the things that we see on television or, or social media or in the movies or in the, you know, magazines or newsprint. And so, honestly, myself, I caught myself saying, wow, if we could all embrace that one element of being more honest, and if that means we have to come, you know, to a secret word, a code word, a trigger word, you know, what a better way to just say no judgment, no harm, no foul, but I’m gonna call the word and you have to be honest and I’m gonna accept that and learn how to communicate more effectively. And so, being honest and open in that moment, it’s powerful. And I, I have started using it myself, um, with my own family and they laugh at me because I’ll just blurt out in the middle of a conversation, Oklahoma. And, you know, they have to tell me, well, you know, we really don’t, I really don’t wanna do that. I I really, I I just didn’t wanna hurt your feelings.
JW:
You know? That is really neat. So they use their actual word Oklahoma in this movie or this show?
LF:
Yeah, in this show. And it’s so funny. Um, they’re, they’re going through counseling, marriage counseling, and the marriage counselor suggests that when they are, you know, wanna be vulnerable with each other, that they have a a word. And the first time that I saw it on the show, I just thought, okay, first of all, that’s cool cuz they’re referencing Oklahoma. But, um, what a neat, you know, non-confrontational way to get your point across without being judgmental or sarcastic or having, you know, ill intent behind it. And I think that it’s also applicable not just to your family, but to your friends, to your coworkers, to your community. Oftentimes we talk a lot about how people get their feelings hurt. And it’s not about that. It’s about fighting different ways to communicate with others who accomplish goals, to move forward, to make positive change, to open those conversations and just be willing to say, I hear you, I see you. And that ultimately moves change forward in a positive way that everybody can come along for the ride.
JW:
You know, I’m gonna go somewhere we probably shouldn’t go, but this whole game of political correctness, because we can’t speak honestly about things in life and us have a very calm, yet a vigorous debate, even though we may have differences of opinion, that really just kind of gets under my skin that we can’t be honest with people. And that’s what you’re really saying. So, yes. You know, at the end of the day, if we don’t have honesty and conversation, how are we ever going to grow as a people on this planet that we all have so much more in common than we differ, but we won’t find the commonality if we’re so hidden behind the veil of, well, it’s just not politically correct to talk about this or that. Uh, and you know, I, I gotta tell you, the world is changing, right? And some of us aren’t adapting as, as quickly as others, but, um, wow. Well, Lori, that’s fantastic. So –
LF:
That’s my nugget for the morning hour.
JW:
That’s, that’s bowl of Cheerios right there. I’m telling you. That is good stuff. Hey, you, you know, this is gonna sound a little crazy, Lori, but I’ve been a father for 27 years. This you July. Can you believe that?
LF:
- Wow. Yeah. Yeah. I got a a long way to go. I’m not there yet.
JW:
Yeah. But it’s hard to explain cause my wife’s only 29. But it medical miracle is what she was. Medical miracle ,
LF:
You are so kind to her. Yeah. God bless her.
JW:
She’s a wonderful saint, you know, and I’m just riding her coattails to heaven someday. That’s all I can tell you. Yes, you are, you are. But I gotta be honest with you, as a father, I still make mistakes when dealing with my daughters that I wish that there had been some training for me to learn and resolve before I made these mistakes. But, you know, that’s just life. Right? And I had a premise in life that I just was always right. Now listen, I’m gonna tell you about my dad. He’ll be 84 this year. My dad had a theory when we were raised as six children in the house. He raised six of us Wow. In our house. It was so funny. My dad came up with this statement that I just loved, even though I didn’t appreciate the outcomes, uh, my dad said, you do not live in a democracy . This is the dyna, this is the dynasty of Robert Williams. And I feed you and clothe you, and you’ll do as I say, and as I say, you’ll do.
LF:
That’s nice. You got the word dynasty. I got the word dictator.
JW:
Yeah. I don’t know where my dad got the dynasty thing. May have come outta that show Dallas, that had to show Dynasty afterwards back in the seventies. I don’t know. But it was so funny. You know, my dad would just say, this is how it’s gonna be. So I always just assumed, goodness, he just walks on water, man. He is right all the time. And I don’t question that. But, um, you know, my, my daughters are beautiful and brilliant. I’ll just tell you up front, that’s a fact. I don’t have to embellish. That’s just how they are. But they attempt to train me in the modern ways of family life. But I keep hanging on to my quote, Ozzie and Harriet years. Do you know who those
LF:
Are? Oh, I do. I do.
JW:
You know, I just love that lifestyle in the Barney five world of Andy Griffith, you know, those kinds of things. Yes. But, um, you’re gonna laugh. Uh, I think if we can remain adaptive and learn, right? Isn’t that all about life? Life is about learning. Yes. So my next word would be to be adaptive and learning, but yet remain grounded in your beliefs and philosophies. Then we can all grow together as humans. And when we grow together, we change the world. Lori. So what’s your biggest challenge maybe in changing your world right now?
LF:
Oh my goodness. Um, well there, you know, there are a lot when you, when you ask that question and the first thing that comes to your mind is probably the thing that you should say first. But then you, you, if you stop and pause for a minute, which I highly recommend before speaking, um, that tends to help. Um, you really think about the things that, oh gosh, what, you know, what challenges do I face? I, I think the biggest thing for me, I am so over the top. I, I collect stickers. I know I’ve, we’ve probably talked about this –
JW:
And adult coloring books.
LF:
Yeah. . My stickers are PG though. They have to be G or PG.
JW:
Oh, good, good, good.
LF:
I, I stick them on things that, that people see. But I have a sticker on my laptop that says, um, apparently I’m over overly dramatic. So I think one of the, and I will own that.
JW:
I could not, I could not even, anyway, imagine that.
LF:
I, I like to think of it as passionate. I’m extremely passionate about, you know, most things that I’m involved in. That’s just the type of person that I am. I have a hard time sometimes communicating that to other people. It comes across as overbearing or over-dramatic or, you know, um, I always have to look at, you know, devil’s advocate and play both sides. And so sometimes I find that I, I’m so passionate about something that I just know that everybody is gonna want to jump on this bandwagon and be part of this change or movement or experiment or project that I often forget that I need to like, make sure I still have people. You know, it’s, it’s kind of like in Forest Gump when he takes off running and all the people start running behind him in the movie and he just says, I just kept running and I just kept running.
LF:
And I sometimes forget, like I’ll have people with me and behind me, but if I don’t pay attention to what’s going on with them individually or part as being part of the group, I, I lose people. Um, because I’m just such a, I’ll do it myself. I’ll get it done. I will, you know, com complete this task regardless. And I struggle with that in terms of affecting change in a positive progressive, uh, way because I just run with it. And I, it’s not a bad thing. It’s, I don’t think it’s a negative thing. I think it’s just a thing that I have to be more self-aware. Um, self, you know, conscious almost to a point. Uh, you know, I, I, that’s where I’m working the best on myself, is to make sure that I am continuing to include the people that I want to be on my team.
LF:
That I want them to be part of it. And I want them to understand the passion and excitement that I have, but I also don’t want to alienate people. And that’s a fine line. So when you were talking about your daughters training you of the ways of the world, um, my, my little light bulb went off because I think that I am exactly there. Uh, just maybe in just, I don’t know, just a little different, it’s hard to explain when you, when you put it out into the universe, you’re like, you’ve just made me very, very vulnerable. But it, it’s a honest conversation to have.
JW:
I believe Ms. Brene would tell you that’s progress. Oh, and you have vulnerability.
LF:
Yes. Yes. Well, again, I mean to, to quote Ted Lasso, um, he calls it prog-mess.
JW:
I like the mixture. I like the mix. Yes. You know, I think, Lori, to be very frank with you, you may be in another universe or some, you know, multiverse as they say on Marvel. You may be a niece of mine or a younger sister. Cuz we think an awful lot of like about some of this stuff. It’s a little uncanny and a little scary to say the least. But anyway –
LF:
It is because we don’t talk about this stuff ahead of time!
JW:
No, I mean, just, Hey folks, turn on the mic and jump in front of it. That’s kind of our philosophy here. Yeah. You know, that’s a great idea. That self-awareness. I will tell you, my wife coined a phrase that I used this day. Uh, everywhere I go in terms of organizations or at my office or whatever, and it’s called a “little Jimmy goes a long way.” So anyway, yes, I take that as a positive, but you know, I don’t-
LF:
We can get you a sticker that says that a little Jimmy goes a long way.
JW:
Uh, that I need. Can you get that? Can you make that happen?
LF:
I think I can.
JW:
You know, you’re right about though changing the world by the honesty of ourselves, our self-awareness and us adapting and so forth. Um, but you know, the only common factor of all of those things is you’ve got to change yourself first. Self. Yeah, we always want everybody else to change, but really when we change ourselves, then those other people that we’re working with, and I hate to use that term other, but people that we are working with or we meet or discuss things during the day, they’re gonna pick up on the fact that we’re having this new way of being present with them and we’re being open to them and we’re being honest and, you know, so, so you gotta face each day with opportunity on your face to make a difference in someone’s life. Uh, let me illustrate with a short story. So recently, uh, I read Success magazine.
JW:
I I’m a big fan of the Success magazine, the c e o had in her, um, opening to the magazine for this edition, uh, about her recent burnout. I mean, she just got burnt out, burning the candle from both ends going through Covid. I mean, who didn’t, right? We were just like, right. The rudders off. Were going all over the place. And, um, so she changed herself in a magnificent way that gave her renewed energy, vision and impact to her company. She started, yes, Lori, you’ve heard me say it before, journaling. Now I know you’re tired of hearing this, Lori, but I gotta tell you –
LF:
Oh the power of the journal.
JW:
It is is outstanding. Um, basically this, she said it is a great tool for her to gain perspective and overcome challenges that she faces in life. She created an acrostic, the letters L-I-V-E, to live, in other words. And she wrote these words, I love this. She said, she’s living her best life when she is leading effectively with vision. So that’s the L – leading effectively with the vision. The I stands for inspiring someone else or being inspired herself. The V- giving value or receiving value makes her feel fulfilled. And doesn’t that do it for all of us, right? Lastly, when she has the letter E, she empathizes or receives empathy. She feels she has purpose. Man, that is just powerful to me.
LF:
Ooh. Yeah. That’s really good.
JW:
Yeah. Well, what’s your next strategy, Ms. Lori?
LF:
Oh, well, okay. Obviously I’m gonna have to start. You know, I, I, I too have journaled. I never journaled before until Jimmy, um, told me about all the benefits of journaling. And I have to say it, I agree with the sentiment that someday in my child’s future or my grandchildren’s future, they will probably be amused by my writings at this juncture in my life. Um, if nothing else, to have a living history, certainly, um, maybe someone will take those journals, you know, someday, Jimmy, and they’ll turn ’em into a, oh, what do you call it, uh, screenplay. And
JW:
It’ll be a, or a memoir. Just have a memoir. Yeah.
LF:
Oscar winning novel. Uh, goodness. The next strategy that I about changing the world, you know, never be afraid to think that an idea is not valuable. So many times I hear, yeah. So many times I hear people say, well, you know, I’ve got this idea, but I, I’ve, I I I’m too scared, or I don’t know where to go to get it started. Or I don’t know who to talk to, or, I, I just don’t, I don’t know if anybody else would even be interested. And if every person that ever had a groundbreaking idea or passion burning deep inside their soul lived in that, you know, gap of I’m unsure, I’m uncertain. I don’t know what to do. We probably would not have some of the best, most successful things in the world. I, I think about things like Habitat for Humanity. I think about Jimmy Carter. Oh yeah. President Jimmy Carter. Yeah. Uh, you know, what a better, more profound way to take an idea and serve of other people.
JW:
You know, what an inspiration, Lori, he, he did not have history is starting to actually, um, recover him from his presidential years. He did a lot of things, but he’s only known for a couple of things that didn’t go as well as, as planned. But one thing about it, I’ve been to his presidential library. This man has done more post president Yeah. Than any other president I know of in history. And, you know, I love to read history about these great, talented people. And I’ve gotta tell you, Jimmy Carter’s at the top of that heap, man, he has done so much and he’s like 90 – is he 97, 98?
LF:
Yes. Yes.
JW:
Incredibly young.
LF:
Well, and I think it’s, think about all the young people that are in college studying law or cancer research or the environment or financial, um, thank goodness nurses, all these people that probably had someone say to them, dream big, take a chance. You know, go forward with the idea and the hope and the burning desire that you can do what you want to do. I wish, when I was younger, I always had this vision that I was going to go into journalism. I was going to be the, you know, um, Barbara Walters and interview celebrities as a kid. I, I specifically remember thinking, oh, I wanna do that when I get older. And I never had anyone tell me that I could. And when I went to college, I majored in communications, which was great. And I love, I mean, I love what I do now as a profession, but I think about young people who probably just need somebody to say, yes you can.
LF:
I believe in you. Embrace what you want to do and know that there’s, if there’s, you know, the old say saying, if there’s a will, there’s a way we need to challenge ourselves as adults to say that more often to young people. And not just elementary or middle or high school students, but college students. College students are the, when you’re in that time of your life, that’s when you probably question yourself more than any other time. What am I doing? Am I cut out for this? Am I going to make it? Is it going to be return on investment? My parents are myself, are taking out loans to, you know, fund this education and am I gonna be able to financially support myself later in life? All those questions that we’re afraid to have conversations about, those are the things that we need to continue to talk about if we’re going to affect positive change. Because listen, those financial analysts and those bankers and those nurses and those scientists are the ones that are gonna be changing the world way ahead of us and think about all the amazing things that they’re gonna do to me. That’s exciting.
JW:
You know, I’ve gotta tell you about another friend of mine. He was a very successful dentist, so a doctor of dentistry specializing in orthodontics. Hmm. He did this for little, I mean, went through all that educational years and years of school. And then, uh, he opened up his practice, actually worked with another doctor for a while, a dentist. And then he opened up his own practice. And then he did that for about 15 years or so. And he said one day he said, and I thought he was kidding. He’s made excellent living doing this, made lots of money. And he said, you know, uh, I’m gonna retire. And I looked at him and I said, Don, you’re, you’re 45 years of age. Wow. And he said, well, you don’t understand. I’m gonna retire from orthodontics. And I said, okay, where are we going afterwards? What’s going on?
JW:
And he said, I wanted to always be, and now stay with me, Lori. I wanted to move to Wyoming and be a fly fisherman guide. He loves tying those little flies that make my eyes cross. That you having that little bitty, you know, and he is now one of the most happy people. He sold the big house and all the trappings. Um, he lives in a very nice modest, but very well adored house in Wyoming on one of the beautiful rivers that they have. And this guy has more to do than he cares to do, but loves every day of it. Now, is he making the same money he made as, as a doctor? Not even close, but the good news is, is he’s doing something he’s passionate about. Like you’re saying that, that he just said that people could, told him he couldn’t do it. You gotta go out and make a living. You gotta go out and do this. And he said, I wanna do something for the most important person in my life. And I said, who’s that? And he said, me.
LF:
It’s true. Uh, side note, Lori is banned from going fishing. So, um, no invitations to go fishing.
JW:
Okay, this is a story I have to know more about. How did this happen?
LF:
Just quickly, because I don’t wanna digress, but, um, I can’t be quiet. And evidently fishing requires a level.
JW:
No, Lori!
LF:
Well fishing requires a level of skill and commitment and focus and quiet. And I was told, please don’t ever come fishing again.
JW:
You know, Lori, it’s just, you have other talents. Just focus on that. Yes. You have other talents. Talents, yes.
LF:
Fishing is not that talent. No.
JW:
Yeah. You know, I think, I think the key to this is, is don’t be afraid to be the best you possible. Is what Lori’s saying. And you know, there, there are people out here that do not encourage but want to keep you at the same level they are. Cuz you know what? It makes your other friends nervous. If you’re accelerating in life and growing up as a person and being bolder and they’re staying in the same position they always have been and maybe always will be. So don’t be afraid to be a bigger better. You go ahead and take the change and face it. You know, cuz growth is never easy. I’ve often heard this as a workout. If you’re not sore, you’re not working the muscle enough for it to really just rip. You know, a muscle doesn’t grow lo until it tears. Right. You gotta tear now, not totally from the bone, but I’m saying the muscle gets fibers torn within it. That’s how you grow. And well that, and I drink, uh, fairlife chocolate milk, but that’s another story . Uh, so, you know, at the end of the, at the end of the day, that’s how we grow as a person too, is to take on those things that are not easy for us. Cuz if it’s easy, everybody would do it. Right?
LF:
That’s right.
JW:
So thanks for listening to us today. This has been a very much eye-opening episode for me. And I did not realize Lori was a talker. Uh, so that really opened –
LF:
Whoa. That’s a big discovery this morning. Okay.
JW:
It, it is. But hey, we’re listening. We are hoping to change the world as well, Lori and I really want to ask that each of you share this podcast with your family and friends. Send a Facebook post to our Live a Life By Design community page and tell us about the ways you wish to change the world. And I promise you this, as Lori and I working together, try together, we can do anything. See you next week, everyone, on –
Both:
Live a Life By Design!
JW:
We’re gonna get that someday. I love it.