Are you prepared if a catastrophic event were to occur in your family? In this episode, Lori and Jimmy share planning tips learning tips to help you become more confident about your future and the protection of your family in the event of disaster striking.
You will gain insight into:
- Why it is critical that you communicate your plan, location of assets and other vital information to a trusted friend or adviser.
- What are the basic three documents Jimmy recommends to assist you with confidence in your estate matters? Hint: They are inexpensive but powerful!
- Who you should ask to serve as your personal representative, healthcare proxy and attorney-in-fact.
- When you should consider a guardianship provision and why you must have one if your children are minors.
- How to create a record of your estate planning desires by simply using your telephone!
Podcast Transcript
LF:
There are many things about the springtime in Oklahoma that we love. We love the wind as it comes sweeping down the plane. We love the rain when it’s nice and calm and soothing. And then there are the things about spring in Oklahoma that we don’t love. And those are the things that most people in Oklahoma stand out on their porch and watch as they go by. Yes, we’re talking about tornadoes. Unfortunately, sometimes disasters strike in the most inopportune times, and we often fail to be as prepared as we would like to be. So this morning, good morning. Thank you for listening to Live a Life By Design podcast. I’m your host, Lori Few and I’m gonna introduce my co-host in just a minute. But let’s get back to being prepared. So this topic got me thinking, you know, with springtime and the weather, what are other things that we can be prepared for in phases of life? One of those things which you may or may not have experienced. I hope you haven’t. I have. And that’s the unexpected loss of a parent, A parent who probably wasn’t prepared on paper, financially, physically, or in any other facet of life. So I’m bringing in the heavy hitter, the expert, the co-host with the most to help me tackle this topic. Good morning, Jimmy.
JW:
Good morning, Lori. You know, it is so wonderful. I really have to tell you though, I flunked your early quiz as you opened up this podcast.
LF:
Oh, no!
JW:
You said, what is it that you stand out on the porch and you watch and I answered parade. I always thought that was really cool to stand on the porch, but apparently you’re talking about some kind of, I don’t know, maybe meteorological problem we have up here in Oklahoma.
LF:
It’s funny that you talk about it. I, you know, people ask all the time when, when you say you travel and, and you say, where are you from? And you say, oh, I’m from Oklahoma. And sometimes they ask, you know, do you still live in teepees? No. Or have you ever seen a tornado? Yes. And it’s just funny that that’s what people do here. You know, it’s kind of that whole conversation about, have you ever seen a tornado? Yes. But I mean, I don’t want to come face to face with one, but I’ve had several of my friends say that they go out and watch them on their front porch and it’s not scary. And they’re not afraid. I’m like, no, I will be in the hidey hole. No, thank you.
JW:
I gotta tell you, you’re gonna laugh. I’m 58 years of age, lived in this state my entire life from birth till now. And I have seen many, many, many tornadoes from a distance that I’ve personally witnessed. But I have never thanked, goodness, been a victim of one of them. Seriously. Never lost a home. Seriously. Yeah. Never lost any vehicles other than to hail had some hail damage. I mean, come on, nobody got hurt. That kind of thing. And I will tell you though, it’s getting too close to home for comfort. Our daughter had one Wednesday night here in Oklahoma near the Oklahoma City area near the, the University of Oklahoma. And she had to rush down to the bottom basement floor of one of their major buildings on campus. Sirens are blaring. Our older daughter was in the same area, a little town called Moore, that’s not little, but a city called Moore, that’s not too far from Norman, between Oklahoma City and Norman. And she was trying to dine with one of her girlfriends from high school. They’d just met up, hadn’t seen each other in years. We’re gonna have a nice meal at a restaurant. And they get their meal. And these sirens start blaring. And seriously the manager and everybody comes out and says, everybody in the restrooms. Everybody in the restrooms. So there’s their meal. Hey, good news though. The restaurant did the right thing, Lori. They gave everyone nice, hot, free meals. Didn’t charge ’em the extras. I mean, wasn’t their fault.
LF:
That’s good. Cause listen, I don’t, I don’t know if I’d wanna be, I mean, during a tornado, I understand if you have to go to a restroom, because if that’s the safest place, but I really don’t wanna be in a restroom with all these strange people. But I good for them that they gave everybody a redo on that dinner.
JW:
I’m not phobic. I keep telling people this and they keep saying, well, you probably are, cuz you keep stating the obvious that you’re not. But I don’t know if I want to go into one of the most germ field areas and stand with people that may have more germs and, and, and ailments and spreading colds and all this. I might just say, you know, I think I’m gonna take my chances here in the dining room with my filet minon-
LF:
- And don’t watch the tornado from the dining room.
JW:
. And by the way, can I have a refill on the tea, please? No. You know, so, so at the end of the day, you know, preparedness is the word we use here in Oklahoma. And hey, you know, I gotta tell you something, it’s funny. Our family, we have a two-story home and been blessed in life. We got a very nice place, but we got a a three acre lot that our home setss on. And when our children were young, I bought these rope ladders cuz they live upstairs. We lived downstairs and we did, we rehearsed this thing where I dropped these ladders down the front of the home. And of course Dina, when they were just practicing, Dina would be at the bottom down there to make sure nobody fell. And I would help them kind of see how to do this and climb down and had them hook the ladder on and, and down they went and, and they thought it was a game, you know, thought it was fun.
JW:
And at the end of the day though, I said, Hey, where do we meet afterwards? And all preparedness really is, and everybody gets this so difficult in their mind, and it’s as simple is plan and execute and communicate. That’s it. And so I told the girls, yeah, there’s a certain tree on his place. I went out there and I showed ’em the tree and sold for practice. I went out and tied a yellow ribbon, thank you, Tony Orlando and Don. But I tied a yellow ribbon around this tree and I said, go to the yellow ribbon until the girls figured out where it was. And they were young. I’m talking five, six years old and we practiced one time and I didn’t help them and Dina didn’t help them. And we all met at the tree in one, one help, you know, healthy piece.
JW:
And that’s the key to this. Right? So everything in life, but I’ve gotta ask you a couple of questions before we get started on this because Lori, I have this week been subjected to some unkind activities. I wanna ask you kind Yes, yes, yes. You know me, I’m always the one spreading kindness. And so when you’re subjected to unkindness, it kind of really makes you write about it in your journal. You know, things I don’t share about how, I didn’t appreciate this. So have you ever, and I mean, be truthful, Lori, you gotta kinda raise your hand. There’s no bible to hand you, but here we go, . Okay. Have you ever been unkind in this way? So let’s assume you’re in a building and you are needing the elevator. And so you’re going to the elevator as the doors start to shut and you’re saying, please hold the elevator. And this lady just looks at you. She doesn’t touch the button, she doesn’t hold the door. Has that ever happened to you? Yes. Have you ever caused that? Have you ever been the lady in the elevator?
LF:
I have been the lady in the elevator.
JW:
The truth comes out, Lori, the truth comes out.
LF:
We’re gonna, we’re gonna just, okay, we’re going there this morning. Yes, I, I was the lady in the elevator one time and it was sort of, I, I didn’t mean I guess it, I guess I did mean it. I don’t know. Kind of unintentional.
JW:
So no forethought and malice at all? No forethought or malice? Just unintentional. Okay.
LF:
I, I got in the elevator and I turned, got, got myself in the elevator and I turned around and I heard the person. And as the person was coming, I dropped my bag. And when I dropped my bag, it just kind of spilled all over the floor. And I was trying to like, go for the button and then she gave me this look like, did you not hear me? And I’m thinking, I dunno what to do. Don’t pick up my stuff. Do I let it close? And by that time, yeah, she probably thought I was really rude.
JW:
So I did something one time, totally inadvertent. I was that guy in the elevator and I meant to hit the open button. Now if you are tall like me, and they put that button at the very bottom of all those floors, you got 28 floors. And at the bottom of that button is there one that says open and closed door. Right? It’s next to the red one that says Emergency stop. And I knew I didn’t wanna hit that one, Lori. Okay. And it, because the alarms go off thinking this, but this lady was just running, I mean, in pumps, man. She looked like she was an athlete. Ooh. And she was running toward the door and she was yelling, hold the elevator, hold the elevator. And I’m pushing this button and I look and I go, and I’m just looking and she can tell I’m doing something. And all of a sudden I just go like this and I’m hitting the dog gone close the door, the door button. And I felt so terrible.
LF:
Again, unintentional.
JW:
Yes. But you know, you feel a heel, you feel like, oh my gosh, I had a chance to help mankind and a destruct a terrible time in their life. And here I’ve made it worse. So, you know, I, I punished myself by going and getting a Starbucks and just trying to chill and figure it out. Oh. And contemplate what happened in the elevator.
LF:
Really like, dissect that in your mind. What could you have done differently?
JW:
So let me take this to something else. Many of our listeners I know drive cars. Have you ever, you know, failed to yield to somebody that’s wanting to get around you?
LF:
Yes.
JW:
You’re just quite the rude person, Lori, today telling me these, I’ll tell ya.
LF:
Oh, we gotta ask better questions.
JW:
Okay. Excuse me.
LF:
Yeah, I have done that. I’ve been in a hurry once before. I got honked at and ooh, they waved at me with one finger.
JW:
With less than all fingers. Huh? Oh, that’s terrible. Terrible. I’m hoping it was the index finger, cuz that’s just pointing at you. That’s the No, no, no. Oh no, please not. The pinky, the pinky finger’s the worst, you know, cause that that little guy just really is out there and he’s just rambus just the pinky finger. Yeah. But you know, I gotta tell you, I have been subjected to honking and didn’t even know it was me. So we are in some big time traffic in Dallas and there’s like eight lanes of traffic, right? And I’m coming north out of Dallas. And it was time, the busiest time of day. And I said to myself, why me? What did I ever do to deserve ? Okay. You know, that’s an old gospel song about what I do wrong. But my point is I’m just going right along in my center lane and I’m trying to get down that center lane because I don’t have two people.
JW:
And I thought to myself, the H O V lane is really wide open, but I don’t wanna break the law. And so I stayed in that lane right next to it. And I’m just cruising along. I’m doing like 75 miles an hour, and there’s this gentleman right on my bumper, and he is honking. And I looked, first, I go, what does he have his emergency flashers on or something going on? And all the lanes are packed. Lori, I mean, don’t take this wrong. I rolled my window down and my car kind of burped like a Tupperware bowl. I mean, it was that tight. It was very tight. So, so this guy’s honking and I’m just, I’m doing this in the car. I mean, I don’t know what to do, fella. I can’t go anywhere. And and so finally there’s a spot I can get over.
JW:
So I move over in this lane and starts slowing down tremendously. And he just goes by and he gives me the Texas wave, if you know what I’m saying. Oh, yes. And it wasn’t the pinky, it wasn’t the index, it was the ring finger I thought, or something in the middle. I don’t know which one it was in the middle Lori. I know which one it was. Whoa. Yeah. And I thought to myself, well how rude, you know, we’re all trying to get out of town. I’m trying to do the right thing here, but let’s talk about being prepared. What what can I do to help our listeners today? I think about being prepared. Lori, what’s the question you have on your mind about preparedness?
LF:
Well, you know, it’s a, it’s a question, but it’s more of a self experience. So my biological mother passed away suddenly at the, when I was 24. She was 45, almost 46. And I suddenly, I suddenly found myself in a situation of unfamiliar territory. I myself had just recently graduated from college, had gotten married, and all of a sudden I am the oldest of my siblings. And my mother was not married at the time of her passing. And my youngest sibling was still living at home. And I did not know what to do. I didn’t know if she had paperwork and I didn’t know who to contact, and I didn’t know who to call. And one of those first conversations that you had with someone, obviously at the hospital, and you know, what, what, what do we do? Where do we send the body? And I, I didn’t, I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know who to call. And I, you know, they asked me, do you have any paperwork? Did she have any life insurance? Did she have any financial planning? Did she have any living a living will, did she have a trust? Did she have any of these documents? And immediately, I, I didn’t know. So after going to her home and searching and tearing through everything I could possibly find, there was nothing. So immediately I was saddled with medical bills in, obviously in her name. Funeral home costs, all the things associated with paying up all of the things, you know, credit card debt house mortgage, car insurance, vehicles, phone bills, and not having anything really to go off of. I didn’t have power of attorney. I didn’t have, she didn’t list me as a beneficiary. I didn’t know what to do. I was so overwhelmed. And I just kept thinking, someone’s gonna come drop out of the sky and Mary poppins me and be my, you know, guide through all of this. And on top of that, grieving and mourning and being so in shock of a loss that I wasn’t prepared for. I just, I had to learn the hard way. And thank goodness I had people that I could call that I, you know, I would just say, listen, I’ve never done this before. Very sudden. I don’t know what to do. Please give me some guidance and some information. So I want our listeners to know that there are people out there that have that expertise and have that knowledge and what they need to know and how they can get their loved ones on board with doing some of that pre-planning. It’s so important. I don’t wish that experience upon anyone. I, I really learned the hard way through a very difficult time. And I think that that’s something that people don’t really want to talk about, but it’s something we need to be talking about.
JW:
Oh, goodness. Yeah. You’ve you’ve kind of opened Pandora’s box of estate planning right there. So, you know, let’s just take this one step at a time. It’s easier to eat the elephant by one, you know, one bite at a time, so to speak, right?
LF:
That’s a big elephant.
JW:
You, you will note I would dare say more than 75% of the people in this great country have not prepared adequately or communicated their intentions with their loved ones. Particularly those that in the thirties and forties, right? No one thinks that they’re gonna die that young. There are accidents all day long. That’s a good fri good. One of my dearest friends from high school just expired this last week. And he lived alone, was divorced, lived alone. We had been trying to contact him from our office several days, couldn’t get him to respond. I thought, well, that’s kind of odd. He always returned the call, you know, emailed him. He didn’t return the email. And I thought, well, he’s, he’s out of town. He probably went on vacation. He does, like I do, turn the phone off if you’re on vacation, right? What we found out though, when they did a you know, they did a welfare check on him because his own kids couldn’t get ahold of him. And so something’s wrong cuz dad’s truck’s still at the, at the house, obviously. And so, so when they went in, they found him that he’d expired face down in his living room. And so, oh, we don’t know how long he had been there, but this is a, a friend of ours and a client and I had sent letters four years earlier, five years early letters. Here’s what we need to do, we need to do this. And it talked about getting basic documents. So Lord, we’re gonna talk just a few minutes. What’s this like? First of all, if you have no documents whatsoever, but you title things properly, that’s a big help. So, so let’s talk about bank accounts. These are very simple, right? Paid on death designations. You don’t even have to be able to write checks on it. But if you were to expire suddenly, then the beneficiary of the account, all they have to do is show up with a desk for certificate and their ID. Boom, the money’s there, they can help pay bills, do whatever’s necessary. You know, a lot of times what we tell people is do some basic things first and you’ll see that you at least have a safety net. Doesn’t mean it’ll catch everything, but it does catch some things. And then also we want you to have some means of emergency fund that you do have available for, you know, I hate to say it for barrel cost. If you don’t have a barrel policy already paid for, life insurance is a great tool for that. Now, I’m not just jump up and go buy all the life insurance you can buy. That’s not the point I’m making. But if you have a family such as you do, for example, where you have minor children you know, you, you lose a breadwinner or you lose someone that contributes to that family support, you gotta replace that somewhere. Because guess what? The day after someone expires, life continues for the rest of those survivors. So we always recommend at least while the children are minors to have something in place relative to replacing that income. And then the third thing as well, this is gonna be just basic sense, but no one really does this. If you’ve got minor children, you need to consider, do I have a least a will with guardianship provisions? Because what happens in all the states of the union, if both biological or adoptive parents pass that state’s Department of Human Services, child protective services will come in and take that child and it will be them that raises them through the system. When you may have a sibling, you may have a parent, you may have a grandparent, somebody that could raise ’em that the child knows. So it’s, it’s a tough situation. And I have actually seen grandparents have to go fight to get their children or grandchildren in this case outta that court system , because their child didn’t list them as the guardian should something happen. It’s, it’s tragic, you know, but let’s talk about what the big three are. Preparedness, have some basic things in mind. Seek out the assistance of a certified financial planner, professional an estate attorney. Seek out someone that’s gonna give you some guidance. You know, even CPAs can help with this role. We’ve doing this many times, help just get some basic things on place. So here’s the things we want you to have, Lord, these are basic. If you do nothing more than have this, this will catch probably 90% of the challenge you have. First is a last willing and testament. And if it’s a minor child, we want you to have a guardianship provision in that will as well. The second thing, we want you to have a physician’s directive. Cuz if you have a terminal illness or if you have a catastrophic event where it looks as though you’re going to an expire, they may give you some life sustaining hydration and nutrition. What am I talking about? Artificial means of support, life, support, keeping you alive. You may or may not wish to have that. This document will also help you donate anatomical gifts. So a great story here. When a friend of mine had died unexpectedly, he had been an organ donor and had noted so on all of his state documents and had also noted on his driver’s license and his heart, kidneys, lungs, and eyes. The corneas were all donated to four different people. And those four people’s lives were extended because the great sacrifice that my friend made at a time when he could have been unprepared, and then those organs would’ve been, you know, possibly not donated if his parents didn’t have the feeling to do so. And this takes that decision out of the survivor’s realm, which I gotta be honest with you, we’re not gonna wanna make that decision if my child’s sitting there. What do you mean her corn is, why, why, why would I do? I’m not even prepared to think about that. You know, that’s the way we think. And this just takes that emotional decision out of the hands of the survivor. And then the last thing we want you to think about is a durable power of attorney. And I’ll use the word durable here, because I wanted to act on your behalf. You’re gonna appoint what’s called an attorney of fact. This attorney in fact is gonna be someone that you said, Hey, if I’m incapable of doing so and making decisions on my own, but I’m not yet expired, I want this person that I appoint to take care of my financial being, to take care of all my needs in terms of my finances, my house, whatever. And that’s exactly what this person does. They step into your shoes until such time as you expire. Then once you expire, this document is null and void. Okay? So those three items, if you do expire, we got the will. If you’re terminal, you got the healthcare proxy. And then also if you’re incapacitated or unconscious, you got the durable power of attorney. So you got a little bit of there that catches most everything. And then at the end of the day, these documents do no good if no one knows they exist. So , the local health, they definitely gotta communicate. Yeah, well, not not just your family, but the local hospital. So what I did with our healthcare proxies, I gave copies to the local hospital and said, Hey, would you please scan these in my record? You know, I came in eight years ago at the emergency room, had a little problem, you guys fixed it. So I know I’m in the system, scan this in there, this is my wishes, and these are my wife’s wishes. And this is our local hospital. Now, if we were to move, do the same thing in the new hospital area where you may go, okay? And then also communicate with your children, children. And it’s not some discussion, we like Lori, but guess what? It’s a discussion we must have because like you were faced with all of those unknowns, how stressful that must have been. I my heart breaks for you because I see too much of this when it could be so easily avoided.
LF:
Well, and I think that’s why I wanted to really kind of go through this topic is because I want, we’re all about educating people and talking about positivity. And I know that this subject is a little heavy and people may not, you know, people may say, well, gosh, that’s just kind of Debbie downer, Lori way to go. But in retrospect, if someone had had those conversations with my mother or if someone had had those conversations with me when I was younger, I might have had a better understanding and a little bit more of an, of an education in that area. Again, it’s not something that we, you know, wanna talk about all the time. It’s kind of one of those things that, like you said, if we can talk about it with our children in a, you know, how do we escape a house fire with a rope ladder? You plan, you execute and you communicate. And if we can do that when we’re young, we just need to bring that forward into our adult lives and have those conversations. I just, I absolutely think it’s imperative. So in going through all that experience, it just solidified the fact that my spouse and I we’re planner type people anyway, in case you did not know that about me.
JW:
I’m sure we all did. We know, we know you’ve got it all planned out. Yes. But remember when there’s a will, you know, there was an old saying, well, there’s a will, there’s a way, you know, this is a new era. So where there’s a will I want my name in it. But anyway, go ahead.
LF:
You’ve heard it here first. He wants, if, if you’re wondering if you need to, you know, include someone Jimmy’s willing to,
JW:
Lori, if you don’t have any beneficiaries, no legalities and no, no kit, just you can name me. Okay? If you need the correct spelling of my name, let me know.
LF:
Jimmy with a Y.
JW:
Y. Yes, that’s correct. Yes.
LF:
But I mean, it, it really triggered the conversation when we decided to start a family of our own. So immediately we, you know, sought the, the guidance of, of an attorney. And the great thing is, most attorneys, most litigators, most financial planners will periodically offer free opportunities to call in and ask questions. It’s a great thing to find in your local community. And, and now with social media, like you can literally just, or Google, you can just Google the word and it will pop up. So we were able to do just that. We were able to execute a will, we were able to do the durable power of attorney and, you know, we have directives. On top of that, we have, you know a trust in place that if something were to happen to us, then we have, you know, designated and organized all of our assets to go into that.
LF:
We have only one child and I did not want to have to burden him with making all those decisions. So if something, you know, were to come up, come up we have that kind of taken care of. And honestly, I don’t even think about it anymore. It’s, we’ve had it in place for so long that now I just know it’s, it’s in the back of my mind. It gives me peace of mind. And I’m just gonna be real honest as I get older, I’m like, everything hurts. Like every Twitch, every pain, every like, and so I’m like, is, if this is what old age is about, like I’m, I’m, I’m not ready, but I do have some things checked off my box, you know, my bucket list.
JW:
You’re gonna laugh. My dad at his gun to the 84 this year, I’m so proud of him. He’s had heart attacks 84. That’s amazing stuff. Yeah, he’s doing great. Came through COVID, nearly died on us, but came through it and he’s 84 and I love it. I talk to him and he always gives me such great wisdom of those ages from when he was born and he says, Hey, listen son, and if you’ll pardon the English the way this is gonna sound, he goes, if it ain’t hurting, it ain’t working today.
LF:
That is so true.
JW:
You know, knees, shoulders, everything, right? Yes. Something though that you can do, Lord, you don’t even have to go see that lawyer right away. Just, and this is the very, very first step I tell people, take out your phone and this is so easy. They do it all day long. Turn that phone on and turn the camera around to face you and simply start recording. What are your wishes? Where are you, where are you keeping the key to the safe deposit box? Where are you banking? Tell me where the deeds are to the home. Just simple things. Who, who’s the life insurance company? Do you have an actual contract number or anything you can put in there? Just simply put this stuff down on video. This is without being an official document, we want you to have the official documents, but if this is all we can get, at least Lori would’ve had some means of going, what’s the first step? Okay, well she said the insurance company XYZ company. I need to go, I call them. I’ve got my mom’s social security number. I know it cuz I’ve had it before. You know, just start that process. And we tell clients, you know, that is not the end all. That is the baby step. The very first thing you could do. And then please go document it with going to an attorney and getting the records put into place.
LF:
And that is absolutely a hundred percent true. So a friend of mine, you know, lost her father unexpectedly. And she called and I said, oh, I’m so sorry. I said, you know, you’re gonna, you’re gonna go through some rough times because, you know, do you have any documents? And she said, oh, I don’t know. I I I I don’t have anything. I don’t know where to look. I don’t. So in the process of going through all of that, she goes to her father’s house and he had the forethought to create a binder. He had a binder, he had tabs with life insurance, bank accounts, annuities, investments, his mortgage company. I mean, he had it all account numbers, passwords, copies of the, you know, where he had made her beneficiary. And he never told her. I mean, it was kind of like a, a little gift to her.
LF:
And I, you know, she called me and said, oh, I found this binder and you know, if this then go here. And it was like a step-by-step guide. And I said, oh, that’s amazing. I am so happy for you. And I I you don’t usually tell people that when people pass, you just say, oh, I’m so sorry, but I, I just told her like, your experience is gonna be so different and I’m so glad for you because that is going to help you navigate through a time where you need to be able to have those moments and be emotional and not worry about those other things. But the reality is, is that those things start compounding anyway. They’re still coming. They still have to, decisions have to be made and, and plans have to be executed and to just, to have that, I mean, wow, I now on the flip side of that, for people who are not paper people, because you know me, I’m, I’m a little bit digital.
JW:
The word isn’t little bit, it’s overwhelmingly”, I think is the term. “Overwhelmingly.””
LF:
Well, but my husband, I will give him credit for this. So just mark that down that I am actually giving him credit for something positive and very important . That doesn’t happen very often. Digital keep digital password keeper where you can upload copies of documents and save your passwords and your account numbers and different things like that. And so it’s all digital. And we use a, a software like that and he just keeps it updated and he puts all the new information as it comes in there. And, and that’s a great thing to have you know, not just for financial or estate planning, but just in life. How many passwords do you have to have? And it’s such a combination. And you can’t use your name and then you can’t use the same password twice. And I mean, it’s gotta have 20 characters and letters and uppercase and lowercase and just, it’s, it’s exhausting.
JW:
And it blows my mind. They’ll say every 90 days you have to change it. I’m going, I just thought of the last one. It’s been 90 days. Wow. Yes, yes. So, you know, here’s something to think about though. We, we produce at Compass Capital Management, we, we specialize in retirement planning. And the sad part of retirement planning is the estate planning portion of that as well. We have what’s called the survivor’s guide. It’s a small little booklet type thing we’ve created that talks about how each step needs to be performed from the time someone passes till the time their estate has been administrated and distributed. I mean, it’s, it’s just from as we say, A to Z. The other thing we, the other thing we have is for while you’re living as you retire, it’s called the Financial Organizer. Just similar to what this young lady’s dad did.
JW:
We have a binder literally that has all these tabs already in it for you. We just ask you three hole punch it, put everything in there and let these people know where everything is inside that there was one section that we call the What to Do section. And you open that section up, that’s it. And it’s got everybody listed. That’s a child with phone numbers, friends to call social Security numbers, the deceased. It’s got everything from bank account numbers, annuity accounts, it’s got everything. And it even has on there where you hide the safe deposit key. And so we tell people, you know, communicate that you have this and where it’s located to your children, your spouse, but use it. And you’d be surprised, we’ve had so many families come in and say, that really saved us a lot of stress when Sam or Joni or mom or dad, whoever had passed that was our client.
JW:
And they’d just pull that binder out and they’d come to our office and go you know, mom or dad passed. And I’d go, yes, we’re, we’re very aware of that. And they said, we got this binder, can you help us? And it has everything in it. And I go, look, your parents were very, very responsible. This is what’s helpful. I will say this, I’m not saying you’re not responsible if you don’t do these matters, but the stress you create on the survivors is tremendous. If you don’t have these things, at least in some format that makes some sense or can lead them to the next clue in your situation where mom was, I’m not picking on mom, but who thinks at the age of 40, 45 that you’re gonna expire? And, and that happens. But then you gotta always think in your mind, what would I do if my, see, that’s what I tell clients.
JW:
Think about what you’re leaving those children of yours or grandchildren that are going, gosh, I, I wouldn’t know. So a case in point of a true story, I won’t belabor the point, but here it is. A client of ours was quite aged, had no children, but had some nieces. So her sister had some daughters. And these were the beneficiaries of several millions of dollars. And these clients of ours were very, very, as as you get older, you, you tend to wanna be more private with things. You don’t share everything, right? You don’t show all your cards. And apparently they don’t have a Facebook account. Cause they put everything on there. Everybody does. But anyway, and so, so the, the funeral’s done, and I I call a family meeting at, at appropriate time after the funeral, we go through the assets that we identified, which we had maybe what we thought was 95% of ’em, we knew most everything.
JW:
But this family had gone out and bought and does hope. You’re sitting down over $800,000 somehow that we didn’t know about of gold and silver bullion bars Now wow. They didn’t, wow. They didn’t have them in a bank vault or a safe deposit bank box. They had them hid throughout their garage and the shop building and these things and lived out in a very, very rural area. The only way we found these was they got ready to list the house. So they were going, going through all these boxes and looking under, you know, stereos and old TVs and just happened to be in the garage. And they go, man, what’s in this bricks? They open it up and they call me and go, you’ve got to come out here. I’m talking 25 mile drive from my office. But I said, you’re kidding me, right? And she said, no. And they took a picture with their phone and I’ll go, oh my gosh, that’s 99% pure gold bullion. I mean, it’s expensive stuff. Wow. And so I drive out there and I go meet me out there. We have got to get an idea of how much this could have, how much this could be. I mean, is it just one bar? She goes, no, there’s boxes. And we found some more in the living room and we found some more in the spare room .
LF:
Going, I mean, who does that? Who just collects gold bullion?
JW:
I mean, yeah, well, wealthy, wealthy people that are just a little eccentric. But here’s the thing, , I said, call your realtor. And they go, you mean we’re still gonna sell? And I said, no, you’re, you’re, you’re canceling contract for right now. We have got to see where all this is hit. Or guess what, if you sell the home, the new buyers get whatever is if within that home is theirs now. And we need to make sure that you girls have everything your, your aunt and uncle intended. It was the craziest thing. True story.
LF:
Wow. I mean, I, that goes back to communicate. I mean, obviously they planned, they, they had the forethought to collect, said gold bars, wow. Just the communication part. Can you imagine if they had sold that house and never knew and the new owner just magically, wow, what a gift.
JW:
Just, I have to put this caveat, I’m not advocating the purchase of gold bullion or silver bullion as a means of saving for retirement. I’m just saying this couple did that because they were concerned about the dollar, for example. Sure. Or sure, yeah. You know, they had been through a time of depression when we didn’t have the money in the, the banks and all this. Well, anyway, my point to all this is, is you’re right, the first thing folks we gotta do is we gotta do some preparation. You gotta at least take the video, write down something. I don’t care if it’s on a big chief tablet with a number two pencil. Just write something down. Tell someone where it’s located. The next thing execute, least do something and write it down. But communicate that with your family, your friend, someone you trust. If you don’t have children, you know, whatever.
JW:
I don’t care if it’s your clergy, if you pull ’em aside and say, look, I just want you to know I don’t have any kids, but I want you to be the one that helps me. And here’s where this thing is. That’s all you have to do. And, and I’ll tell you, it’s just makes your your heart feel better that you don’t stress others out. Of course there are some that think, and Lori, I hate to say this, there’s some that think, why do I care? I’m not gonna be worried about it. That’s this kind of a selfish attitude, you know?
LF:
True. I mean, I, I certainly don’t wish my situation upon anyone. I want people to learn knowledge from this experience. And, and we got through it and it, it was fine. But in going, in, going through all that, and having said that, it could have been a whole lot different of an experience. It could have been a totally different outcome if things had been planned, executed, and communicated.
JW:
Now we know what we need to do. So how about our challenges week, Lori? Why don’t we do what we know we need to do? And folks, I gotta be honest with you, absolutely. This doesn’t take a whole lot of time if you do nothing else. This next week, Lori, and I want you to do one thing. We want you to either list it out on a piece of paper or do the simple thing. Take that phone, and if you’re concerned about security on the phone, then write it down. But take some time. Take just 30 minutes and list out all the important things that you might need to let someone know should you inadvertently and quickly leave this planet. And the issue boils down to you’ll be thought of in a lot higher probably of, of, of love and admiration if you don’t stick somebody with a big challenge, right? To, to do your cleanup work for you, so to speak.
LF:
Now, I’m not saying you can’t send someone a send someone on a scavenger hunt, obviously and the unintended gold bullion scavenger hunt. But in all seriousness, we thank you for listening this morning. We hope that you gained a little bit of insight into some experiences from listening to some of our stories. Reach out, communicate, ride it Down, go out. Have a great week and…
Both:
Live a life by design!
JW:
Hey, we’re gonna get that! I promise.
LF:
Maybe!
JW:
Hey, folks, we appreciate you so much. Have a great week. As Lori said, we’ll see you here next week on Live Life By Design.
