Do you ever wish you had a better life? In this episode, Lori and Jimmy share their approaches to designing and realizing their desired lifestyles by using goals.
Episode Keys:
- How you can grow your future by setting and monitoring your progress on your goals.
- Why you must decide how you wish your life to be (or it will happen by default).
- When you should be reviewing your goals to keep them top of mind.
- Sources to use for tracking your goal progress that will keep you inspired.
- Who you should share your goals with and who you shouldn’t!
Podcast Transcript
JW:
A new year, new opportunities, new challenges, perhaps. I was speaking with a friend between Christmas and New Year’s Day, and our conversation eventually mentioned our goals for the new year. My friend simply stated that he had hoped it would be a good year for his family and him. I asked him one simple question. He was perplexed to say the least. The question was, how many goals did you set and accomplish in 2022? He looked down at the ground as if I had convicted him of theft and said I didn’t write any goals down because I didn’t want to be a failure. Hey, good morning. This is Jimmy Williams –
LF:
- And Lori Few –
JW:
- With Live a Life By Design Podcast. Hey, we’re starting off in sync today.
LF:
We’re trying. New year. New goals.
JW:
That’s it, you know. Hey, today we’re going to explore the importance of defining, clarifying and recording your goals for a bigger, better future. Do you realize that scientists inform us that our subconscious mind goes to work helping us achieve our goals? From the time you write them down, Lori, that’s big.
LF:
Well, depending on how you write them down, you know, in the technological age, we type them down, if you will, on a piece of electronic equipment. But we both know that Jimmy and I are paper pencil people, so we definitely will write it down, even if it’s on sticky note. It’s important to write it down however you write them down. Don’t forget.
JW:
I agree. And I’m gonna tell you why it’s so important to write them down here in a few moments. But this explains the importance of writing down your goals and reviewing them periodically. So, Lori, my big question to start this podcast out today, what is your most important goal for 2023?
LF:
Ah, the word of the year. It’s, it’s a word. It’s a goal. It’s a movement for me. And it’s simplify.
JW:
Oh, that word again, I love that. Yes.
LF:
I’m gonna start the year off right? I am doing it by simplifying my wardrobe. I did a great reorganization of the world of glory during the Christmas break. I am simplifying my calendar. I’m simplifying my, even my eating habits. I am trying to make it easy on myself. I’m working on lots of lofty goals in terms of meal prepping and planning. We’ll see how that goes because in the life of busy, you can have the greatest intentions of setting a simplifying goal to meal prep every day. But there’s always that detour that happens and you’re like, wait a minute, I have to change my plans. Or I forgot to, you know, set something out for dinner. So we’ll see how it goes. But simplify is so far the word of 2023. And I know it’s early in the month, but we’re going for it.
JW:
So if I may ask ma’am, simplify, does that mean pushing the button on the microwave or does that mean turning the oven on?
LF:
Listen, it is. So, I’m so not the cook. My husband is far more adept in the kitchen than I am. I’m definitely a microwave girl, to be completely honest.
JW:
I gotta tell you, my daughter, the younger one particularly, is like the 101 ways to fix anything you want with a microwave. She can handle it.
LF:
Sounds true. And social media does a great job of that. That’s one positive thing that I have found from social media. I learned just not too long ago that there’s a super quick, fast way to take a sweet potato and make it into this glorious dish. And I learned it in less than three minutes on TikTok.
JW:
That now see, there you go. What education can you gain in three minutes anywhere else, right? So hate, you know, your word of simplifying how you’ve implemented that word into all facets of your goals for the year is really, is really big part of the criteria for how to be successful. So you have to find something, a, that you’re committed to, and B, you have to have already seen yourself winning the goal till the commitment will last. Does that make sense?
LF:
It makes sense, but let’s talk about clarifying that. Can you give us a little clarification as to goals, Jimmy?
JW:
Absolutely. Are you asking the question, have you got enough time this morning? Now, here I go.
LF:
Okay, let’s do it!
JW:
So like Lori said, basically if you sit down and write them down, and I prefer like she, I prefer pen and paper because the act of writing and utilizes a different portion of the brain than simply typing something. So you’re more able to remember what you wrote than what you typed. Now that’s not Jimmy talking, that’s the doctors and those biologists and everybody else that studies all these things. But at the end of the day, clarifying it to where your brain has a clear picture. So here’s what I tell everyone. I sat down a goal that says I wanna lose weight. Well, to me that’s not even a goal. And here’s why. It’s not measurable how much weight it is when it’s not time to defined. When do you wanna lose it by? Are you saying the next five years, the next month, the next two years, whatever.
JW:
And then also you have, think about it, is it something that excites you? I gotta be honest, we goal loss doesn’t excite me, Lori, I gotta be honest with you. I love good food, but better than that, I love the people that cook that good food. If it’s my wife, I’m telling you right now. So, so at the end of the day, we want you to clarify, we want it to be first of all what we call basically smarter. It’s gotta be specific. So I wanna say what I want to do, it’s gotta be measurable. I gotta say when I want to have it done right, it’s gotta be achievable. So if I said to you, Lori, today I’m putting on mine January 1st, 2023, I’m gonna lose a hundred pounds in 23, you would look at me with those big beautiful eyes, yours. And you’d say, Jimmy, I just don’t see that happening.
JW:
Cuz you put it on over the last 25 years. Doesn’t mean you’re gonna take it off in a year. And you’d be absolutely correct. And so clarity, then look at, you know, the there are in that basically is, is that a realizable goal? Well, you have to realistically look at this and say, no, a hundred pounds a year for me. Now, absent someone that’s you know, significantly obese and I I don’t, not picking on those people, but I’m saying some of those people that weigh six, 700 pounds, I’ve heard of them losing a hundred pounds in a year. Jimmy weighs a very T two 40 and so it would be hard for me to lose a hundred pounds. Well don’t you imagine my lulu lemon pants just fall right off? But anyway, wow. Yeah, you don’t even wanna go there. And so, so at the end of the day then that, that t word as I said has to be, you know, time sensitive and we have to be excited about it.
JW:
There’s a e on there excited about it. And at the end of the day, I wanna know what can I do to put all that in clarity? Well first of all, then I will lose. And a lot of people use past tense. I have lost 30 pounds in 52 weeks in 2023 by losing one third of a pound a week or whatever the math comes out to be, right? And at the end of the day, that’s clarity. Cuz then I can measure it in those microcosms of of time that say, Hey, I’m gonna get this thing done. Because the worst thing you can do is, as they say in most resolutions, guess what? I’m gonna give up drinking coffee. Well, we know what Lori that’s gonna last about, hang on with me. That’s gonna last about 30 minutes anyway.
LF:
I don’t even give that 30 minutes.
JW:
There you go. There you go. Well, we all have addictions to deal with in life. But here’s the thing about that. You want to clarify something that truly excites you to do so. So you have to do something with that. I will lose 30 pounds in 2023 and 12 months because it’s going to be better for my overall health. Okay? That’s specific, measurable time. It got excitement in there cause I wanna be healthier, that kind of thing. So my point is that’s what clarification is. So let’s take your goal, you wanna simplify things, but how do I simplify? Will I reduce my wardrobe by 30% of the stuff that I don’t wear? I take and donate to the wig closet for women that need not only wigs, they got clothing or you got formal dresses you’re not wearing anymore because they’re too big. See where I went there?
LF:
Oh, nice, nice so generous this morning.
JW:
Yeah, donate those to the prom closet or the, the whatever closet for the kids wear to pro. You know what I’m saying? So, but, but have, have a number, have a specificity at least in some form. And then give yourself some time, right? Too often people say 80% of the resolutions you make on January one are busted by the third week of January.
LF:
It’s so true. And, and to add to that to simplify, for me to compound that idea that I’m gonna want to continue to do this for more than, you know, three or four days. I, I think of repetition doing it consistently. So, you know, going through my closet, simplifying my closet in January. Okay? So I wanna do that again maybe in June when the summer gets here and just reevaluate. I think that goals are such things of repetition and reevaluation that every so often it’s great to just stop and take stock of what you’ve accomplished. And in that goal, it doesn’t necessarily mean that if you can’t complete it 100% by the end date that you’ve set, it just means that you need to retool or retwe that idea. I can still simplify, but maybe for a brief moment in time, I need to simplify in another area or I need to think about how I can simplify or apply it to whatever I’m handling at the moment instead of throwing it out the window.
JW:
And so, for example, let’s say you’re simplifying your clothing and so forth, hey, that’s one aspect of life. But how about if I simplify and I dare say it, simplify my house. In other words, do I really need all of this stuff here to take care of and clean and whatever? If there’s a way to do it at your office, do I need to simplify my desk area? Is it something that I just have to access every day? If not, it doesn’t need to be on my desk, it’s just in my way, you know, and things are distractions and I’m gonna simplify my electronic life. Whoop, wait a minute, I went there. I’m getting off of some of these things even that are feeds that I’ve used for years. I’m just saying, you know, I really don’t get that much value out of it anymore, so I’m quitting that as well. So there’s some things I’m doing as well, you as you, but I’m just taking it to all facets of life. What’s your thoughts?
LF:
I think it’s important to reevaluate. I I think it’s anything we’ve learned in the last several years that it’s great to take stock of what’s currently happening, what’s on your plate, what’s on your calendar, what you’re looking at in the future. Because all of those things are, they, they, they collide at some point. Like we love to talk about structure and organization on this podcast and about how important all of that is, but sometimes your life just, I don’t know, not to get scientific, and I’m not using the right word, but almost like a blob. I mean, sometimes life just gets into this ABA shape and we’re just floating around in this chaotic mess. And I, I, I think that it’s important to even embrace that time. It’s not gonna stay stay that way. It’s a fluid situation, it’s a fluid moment. It’s a fluid calendar. Things are gonna come and go and we don’t always have control. But I mean, it’s important to realize that and, and just kind of, you know, sometimes it’s OK to just get lost in the chaos, but know that it’s okay and to take a, a breath and take a beat and then refocus as much as possible to keep going in that direction of your goal.
JW:
Oh, I love that. And I will tell you an area I’m simplifying as well we haven’t even talked about is I’m talking about my eating regimen. Okay? So we’re, we’re actually gonna quit going to the Cheesecake Factory, but only once a week.
LF:
I’m telling you, you can go every day and never try something twice.
JW:
Oh my gosh. And think about what they do. You come in the front door, where do they put the cheesecake rack? Right in the front door. How dare they use subliminal messaging!
LF:
I’m a dessert first person, bring it on. I’m ready!
JW:
I love that about you. And I will tell you though, one thing I have done though is I stay away. You know, they have a very big menu by the way. Yes. I mean it’s, it’s a big menu. And what I do is I have now asked the white staff, I’ll say, please don’t gimme anything other than the skinny lis cuz they wanna leave you that dessert menu with it. You know? And I’m kinda like, oh boy, that that tuxedo black and white cheesecake really looks good every time I go in. But so what I do is I stay with that skinny stuff and now you’re gonna laugh, Jimmy. What’s that have to do with diet? It has nothing to do with it. It just lets me say when I’m through eating, I’m not so full that I feel bad about myself that I didn’t watch what I partake. Right. And I don’t do, I don’t do a cheesecake. You’re gonna laugh though. But I always take someone’s skinny with me, like my daughter and she orders and I get just that one spoonful. Now you’re gonna laugh. This is my treat. I get, well, one fork, I just take one fork full and I go, oh, that’s, that’s enough. That’s good. And then that’s how it works. Simplify.
LF:
Oh, you have simplified. That is, yeah. One bite. I just, I don’t, I applaud your effort. I do, but I just don’t know if I could do it.
JW:
Let me talk to you about, one word starts with an A and ends with the word shun. Addiction is what Jimmy has. The Cheesecake Factory, you know, and they know it’s me coming in cuz Oh, I’ll tell you what, they’ll have someone, for whatever reason, I think they time it this way, but they say, oh, we’re just delivering this to one of our excellent customers. They’ll have this whole plate about four or five different cheesecakes go right by me at the, at the whole stand. And I’m going, I’ll just take one of each Okay.
LF:
Just one of each. That’s all I need.
JW:
So, you know, we talked about those setting goals, we talked about clarifying goals, but now tell me this, how do you Lori, record your goals and then maybe check on your progress that you make during the year?
LF:
Well, I’m a obviously I’m a huge note taker. I, I love journaling and I love writing things down and I, I keep track of things, you know, in pencil paper, but I also keep track of things, you know, on, on the phone, you know, the mysterious thing that we can’t seem to ever, you know, part with or live without. But I, I really learned last year, Jimmy, when we started talking about New Year’s resolution and goals, like every three months. So every three months I write it down, what do I wanna accomplish? What do I wanna look at? What do I think I wanna do? And, and I just go back to that. And I, I never really fully hit that three months of, I checked everything off the list that I wanted to do to achieve the goal. But if I get two-thirds of that, then I’m pretty proud of myself. And then looking back at it, what I’ve written down after that time has passed. I sometimes look at it and go, I really wasn’t ever gonna achieve that anyway. Or I, I thought I wanted that, but now that I’ve gotten into it this far, I really wanna go in this direction. So looking back to look forward, I know that sounds kind of hokey, especially new, you know, new Year’s time, but it’s, it’s absolutely true. And I think it’s vital to anybody that’s wanting to achieve a goal.
JW:
You know, absolutely. And I will say to you that, have you ever, you, you’re a lot younger than me, you’re still in your twenties, but hey, do you remember this stuff called Silly Putty?
LF:
Yes. Oh yes. Silly Putty was the predecessor to the fidget toy.
JW:
Yes, yes, yes.
LF:
For those of you that are young and listening, think about the fidget toy. That our fidget toy was silly putty.
JW:
So silly putty if you remember, and you just pulled it so you thin enough you could almost read through it. Right? That’s, that’s how I feel sometimes when we get ourselves so overwhelmed with making this process so difficult. You just give up and you can’t give up as a human being, right? Where there’s no giving up to the barriers. Right? And so, at the end of the day, my point there is I love the way you’re recording. So I actually do mine. You’re gonna laugh. I do mine and my full focus planner, I, you’ve heard me talk about it many times and I attract those on a weekly basis. Did. And if what I do is I take a little check mark, I have what’s called a consistency tracker. I put in there, I put a little check mark every week that I worked on something of my goals.
JW:
Now what happens on Lori, if I don’t see any red check marks, oh, somebody’s off the tracks, right? Gotta go back, like you said, look backwards to measure and go further forward. So I’m measuring how well I do. I got some progress now let’s get back on the track and go forward. And so I actually use that and I, I be very honest with you, it works well for me because it’s in handwriting. I can check it with my little check marks and I’m making progress. And then I look at, don’t laugh, I have what’s called a life plan. Now, Lori, don’t laugh, I’ve gone that far. I had in my twenties when I was about 23, is when I did it, I had a 25 year goal.
LF:
And?
JW:
I met it early. It was to have my own business and be successful at what I was doing. And, and there’s some details of that, but I won’t bore you with those. But my point is, I had a 25 year goal. “Now wait a minute, Jimmy, you’re 23.” I just graduated, had my first year, my first year in the business, got my CPA certificate, but I had a goal. And, and everybody says, well how do you stay passionate about that? Well, what I did, I said a bunch of smaller term goals that incrementally added up to get to that point, right? I didn’t just jump out and say, Hey, I’m gonna invest all this money and start my own business when I’m 23. No, that doesn’t work that way very often unless you’re Mark Zuckerberg or something in your, you know, dorm room doing something like that. But my point here is, is people is measuring what you do on a weekly or daily or some kind of basis that’s consistent to see that progress is being made without it. I just don’t know how you can cope with a changing world. Sometimes a changing life for you that you didn’t ask, right? I mean, a lot of things happen in life that we didn’t plan.
LF:
There’s a lot of things you can control and a lot of things that you can’t. And I think that’s absolutely true. But what a testament though, to, to the ultimate goal setter. I think you need a t-shirt, “ultimate goal setter”.
JW:
I’m gonna, I’m gonna get one with a little box that’s not checked yet and it just says, it says age 124. Nailed it. Anyway, so you nailed it. I think I told you that’s what my goal is, 124.
LF:
Yes, you did say that!
JW:
I gotta be honest with you, it’s in the goal package cuz I’ve got a lot of books to write and things to do. So you know what, that’s my approach and that’s what I’d recommend for recording and monitoring. Make sure those are written down clearly. You clarify them and get ’em recorded somewhere you can refer to often.
LF:
Okay? So let’s recap this process. First, think about how you wish your life were being lived. That’s one thing that we’ve talked about. Second, write down the goal in broad terms with possible constraints such as time units gained or lost, we’ve touched on that. And third, clarify your goals by writing in a manner that makes the goal very clear in your mind. And for a period of time that makes you focus to achieve them. Your progress. You celebrate the steps, the baby steps. Even if they’re small, you still celebrate those wins during the year to gain momentum in life.
JW:
Preferably with cheesecake. But anyway…
LF:
Yes! One bite at a time.
JW:
Hey folks, this has been a wonderful first episode of 2023. We’re so excited you, you could join us. Hey, do us a big favor. Reach out, shake the hand to someone near you and tell ’em you are empowered and ready to go. You’ve listened to this podcast. Your goals are set in writing and go out and be the 1% of the world. Do you realize that 1% of the world will accomplish far more than the rest if we just have those written goals and follow this particular easy approach to getting those recorded and monitored? So this week we want you, Lori, and I ask you to identify, clarify, and record three goals in any area of life you wish, and share one of your goals with us on our community, on Facebook at Live a Life By Design. Lori, take it away.
LF:
Go out, make it a great week. Write it down. Even if you have to use technology, that’s acceptable, Jimmy and I will forgive you. Just do it anyway! And go out and Live a Life By Design.
JW:
Oh, that was just beautiful. Have a good week, everybody.
