Episode 164: Relationships: The Foundation to Success in Life

Do you wish you had better relationships in your life? In this episode, Lori and Jimmy share the four cornerstones to building lasting relationships.

Episode Keys:

  • The power of trust as a foundational facet of relationships!
  • Why you must show empathy to deepen your relationships and grow them over time.
  • When and how you communicate is key to truly responding to emotions and understanding between two people.
  • How to identify people you wish to experience a better relationship with in life.
  • Why women and men have difficulty communicating and what you can do to improve it!

Podcast Transcript

LF:
Good morning listeners. Yes, you’re not hearing the voice of Jimmy Williams this morning. You are hearing the voice of the co-host with the most, according to Jimmy. Good morning! I’m Lori Few and I’m excited to be on the podcast this morning. We have got a great topic to talk about. We’re gonna talk about no, I know what you’re thinking. We’re not gonna talk about coffee, although we probably will get to that at some point, because that’s my favorite thing to talk about. But this morning, we’re gonna talk about relationships and not only relationships, we’re gonna talk about four cornerstones of what relationships are built upon. And so I could not do this without my co-host with the most say good morning to Mr. Jimmy Williams.

JW:
Hey, good morning, everybody. You didn’t think she’d get by with coming on this show without me. I mean the mouth of the south. All right. Hey, the world doesn’t turn until I start telling it to turn. I mean, that’s the way the world is. My wife always says Lori, here’s Jimmy hands right here. Here’s the hand going around it. That’s the rest of the world. All right. That’s just how this works folks. Oh, Hey, good morning. Beautiful day, day. Yeah, Lord.

LF:
Oh yeah. Well the, the word revolved around Jimmy, we know this.

JW:
He likes to think that, but folks, I do know the truth, cuz I’m married a fine woman. Oh a fine woman. 35 years is September. And she puts me right where I need to be all the time. Humble is the term I would use. I’ll just be very humble, but no on a serious note. Hey, thanks for joining us today at Live a Life By Design. Lori opened the show perfectly. This is going to be a topic for the century. Why am I saying that? Because I have a wonderful lady that can talk to anyone cuz she’s a woman. And then you have me Jimmy, the stumbling words come out. As I talk to different people of different ages, we’re gonna go into some gen Z conversations. Lori, I have got you some ideas here that I think will help our listeners today. So let’s get going.

LF:
Well, I think it’s great. So we’re gonna start off Jimmy. I want you to start off with the first cornerstone of all relationships. What’s the most top of your list. Most important thing to start with

JW:
The most important thing. This is the, a cornerstone without this, you do not have any other support for a relationship. And that is thet word trust. Oh,

LF:
Okay. That’s not thet word. I was thinking, but, let’s start with trust.

JW:
Yeah. You know, so, so let’s talk a little bit about trust without trust. You don’t really have a relationship in my opinion, because if I can’t trust you by confiding and sharing with some, maybe my most personal matters with you as a dear friend, you know, you’re probably gonna inwardly keep everything right? So I’d journal anyway, I’d get it out somewhere, but not nearly the same as if you had feedback from someone that maybe has experienced the similar matter you’re going through. And if, as you always say, you know, you grow through what you go through. Maybe they’ve gone through something before that. You’re just now experiencing and they have a little bit of a secret. Maybe they have a little edge that helped them cope or maybe even thrive through the challenges that they’ve faced. And so, you know, to me, it’s always about trust.

JW:
I will say it like this. My dad always said it to me like this, you know, he’s got a formal education, he’s got a sixth grade education, but he has a PhD in the wisdom of life. Lori, I’m telling you, you know, I’ve got six hours toward a PhD, a real one. And my dad only six, well, I just didn’t see in my career how that was gonna get me, where I wanted to go, unless I wanted to be a professor or something, you know? But what I did is I said to myself, you know, every time I think I’m making gains on that day of mine, he says something so profound. So here’s what he told me. And I was a younger lab when he told me this, but he always brings this up to me. And he says, your trust that others place in you is gained in years and lost in seconds.

LF:
So true. So isn’t deep and I, well, its very deep and I think it’s very poignant for this topic of conversation this morning because we spend so much time navigating the workplace with different types of people in different types of situations. That the number one thing I think you’re absolutely right. A great topic to start off with is trust.

JW:
I think I talk a little bit. Yeah. About my wife going behind my back. Lemme tell you what she did. Ooh. Yeah. What the trust was broken for. Like, I don’t know, at least an hour. And so

LF:
Just an hour, she,

JW:
She goes to a local ice cream store where she knows that my favorite yogurt is at this ice cream store and she proceeds to come home and she’s got two scoops of real chocolate ice cream whipped cream and nuts on it. And she’s eating it. Not knowing that I was gonna be home and I’m surprised her. And I came home. My car’s in the garage. She didn’t sick. She parks her car outside. She walks in and she goes, oh, what are you doing here? And I said, AHA and I caught her cheating on me with carbs. All right. That’s the worst kinda cheating. That’s the worst kinda cheating Lori. I’ll stand by that all day

LF:
Carbs. Oh, it’s a deal breaker ruined, ruined.

JW:
I’m hurt. I’m really hurt. But anyway.

LF:
Cornerstone. Cornerstone’s interesting power. I don’t know. I just, I like the word cornerstone, but empathy is what I tend to think of in a relationship. I just, and sometimes you talk about it with people and people are well I’m, I’m empathetic. I, I can see from your side or I understand your perspective and I, I feel your pain, but sometimes people don’t need us to feel or be validated. Sometimes people just need to be hurt. Being empathetic is listening. And I know that we’ve talked before on the podcast about positive attributes in the workplace and different types of listening. We’ve talked about active listening if you’ll recall, but being empathetic to me is just giving that person the opportunity to say, I don’t feel valued in this certain work situation or in a personal situation. I don’t think what we need to be so sensitive to take things personal, showing people empathy helps us grow as individuals, but it also helps in professional settings, community settings, organizational settings, that if we are more empathetic, it benefits everybody in the long haul.

JW:
Oh absolutely. And I can relate. I’ve been pathetic my entire life on a lot of things and Lori, I can relate to that work. Oh, empathetic.

LF:
Empathetic!

JW:
Oh, I thought you said pathetic. I’m sorry. That well, that changes the whole story. Yes, of course empathy. Yes. I, I thought you were saying pathetic and I’m sitting there going, you know, she’s nailed me to the wall here on that one. That right in the heart folks. Lori and I have been dear friends for a long time, but I thought she really knows me now. She called me pathetic on our own show in front of thousands. If not millions of people,

LF:
I have pulled back the veils I’ve pulled it back. All honesty. We’re ING it all out this morning. Yes. Jimmy you’re pathetic. No, I’m kidding. I’m kidding.

JW:
I dunno about a veil, but she tore the scab off of a wound. It came 30 years ago. No kidding.

JW:
You know, we’re having a lot of fun today folks, cuz you know why it’s Monday and why not? You know, Monday to us is just a Friday that got left behind Lori and I is love Mondays just like Fridays, you know, but no empathy. So the big thing to me about empathy, Lori is you are absolutely right. People need to first understand you before they can really communicate with you. You see the difference in the preposition. If, if they don’t understand what you’re going through, how can they relate, right?

LF:
Yes, absolutely. And, and some of that is just commonality. Some people, you know, that you share with or that you want to be empathetic with, you know, it kind of goes back to what you were talking about, about trust. You may not have a similar circumstance or, or a similar situation, but you can learn by experiencing those things with those people. It’s not that someone just needs to unload on you or that they need to have you bear their problems or bear their burden. It’s just that sometimes by experiencing those conversations and situations with someone you can grow from that as well.

JW:
Oh man, that is well put, well put and I will say this, you can learn to be empathetic if you don’t feel like you naturally come through your own emotions with it, you know all of these emotions. So, so think about this trust. That is a skill you develop. You just have to be honest, not with just the people you’re talking with. And I didn’t say two, you’re talking with you also have to be honest to the person that’s most important that’s yourself. So I read a book and it talked about part of the book was the best person to never lie to is you, so think about that. True. It’s so true. That’s a cool, cool phrase in the book. And at the end of the day, I got to read that book and I got to writing in my journal. I thought, yeah, man, I’ve been lying myself about this.

JW:
You know, I, I want to lose 40 pounds, but I like to go to eat Broms yogurt. I mean, how does that ever con congruently is not there. You know, don’t listen, Mr. Broms, this isn’t bad too. About your yogurt. I love the stuff. It’s just got carbs in it and stuff. But so empathy to me though, is at times showing someone that your, your weakness go go back to, you know, Brene, right? She says, showing signs of weakness is actually a sign of strength to the other person. They know that you’re not just one of these people made out of rock. You know, we’re all men and, and we, men can’t cry and we men can’t so hurt. You know, even if we got a bone sticking out of our collar and there’s blood all over, so we gotta act like it doesn’t hurt. You know that.

LF:
Visualize that this morning.

JW:
You know, I love that. You know, I’m feeling a little bit of pain around my neck. Well, sure. You’re, clavical sticking outta the side of your shoulder there. But you know, I mean, at the end of the day, that that empathy comes from being understanding first of others’ pain and, and maybe the source of their, their concern or their cause of reasoning for being hurt, whatever it is. But to be empathetic to someone means to me that you truly understand them.

LF:
Yeah. That’s so important. So let’s talk about the third cornerstone, Jimmy, what is it?

JW:
It’s the worst thing that men could ever have as a challenge to their being on the planet? There was a book. I I’m gonna give you the word in just saying, but there was a book I read truly, this is the title of the book. I’m not making this up. Lori, you, the title of the book was men are clams and women are crowbars. What’s the title. I read this book and I shared it with my wife. And she said that Ja, that gentleman with the PhD is spot on. So we meet, we men come home and we only have, and the scientists prove this social scientists prove this behavioral scientists upheld this, that men come home from their day of whatever they’re doing. You know, we’re out on the street doing something or we’re working in an office or whatever we’re doing. And we spend our 5,700 words.

JW:
By the time we get ready to come home, we have no words left. Women have over 20,000 words a day that they will use. I don’t know why that is. I’m not picking on women versus men. I’m just telling you what the scientists say. So when my wife, when I get home, my wife wants to do what she goes, Hey, how’s your day. How’d it go today. Let me tell you what happened to my day. And I just sit there and I’m going, oh, it’s been a long day. You know? No. But at the end of the day, that word to me is communication. You see if you want a true foundation of any relationship, husband, wife, partner, partner, whatever you are friend, friend. It doesn’t matter to me communication. And we men admittedly right now, Lori are not really good at that. I have worked diligently on my skills to communicate, but here’s the bigger problem. You know what it is?

LF:
Nope.

JW:
It’s not the speaking. It’s the listening.

LF:
The listening.

JW:
We’re often trying to figure out what we’re gonna say next, before we ever hear what you say, right? Didn’t hear what’d.

LF:
I was gonna say, I don’t listening. That’s not a problem at my house. Is that I dunno.

JW:
I’m always, I’m like to my wife, I’m going a be pardon? I mean what you say but on a serious note, you communication now you’ve been married. Well, not quite as long as us, but because you’re a lot younger, but, but you’ve been married a while. I mean, over a decade and you, and you, you sit back and you go, let me say, when we were first married, I can tell you, we didn’t have this seamless ability to read each other’s minds and communicate as well as we probably should. But now you’ve been married to my good buddy, Justin for a while. And you probably go, I can finish his sentences people. I mean, that’s where we’re at, right? My close.

LF:
Well, I, I can finish his sentences, but I also have to find him like, he gets lost it’s there are times where I will text him and, or I honestly, I recently had to download an app to track him because he, he leaves things like his phone wallet as he, so I know he is not listening, always, although I can read his mind most times to finish his sentences. I’m more concerned about losing him.

JW:
I’ve seen this app, isn’t it? The shape of a little boy holding his hand up like this. And it says lost your kid. Something like this yet.

LF:
Yes. Well, in terms of, in terms of communication, I think it’s really relevant in the workplace. We talk about so many things that during the pandemic that we learned, we learned how to do zoom. We learned how to do you know, Google voice. We learned how to do videos. We learned how to do all these things to communicate, but the relationship part of communication is actually making sure that the person understands where you’re coming from. We talk a lot about how you can’t read an email without assuming someone’s tone or a text message. For that matter. It’s hard to build a relationship with someone if you’re constantly communicating in the digital tech world, because you can’t always discern how that person really feels about that conversation or that project or that, you know, program that you’re working on together. And so face to face communication obviously is always the best.

LF:
I’m an animated talker. I communicate with my hands. I communicate with my face. It’s really difficult to do that in a read only type of world. So I’ve had to really struggle with how can I be better about communicating within my work relationships? And it’s a, a constant let’s be paying, you know, let’s be paying attention and let’s listen and, and let’s see how other people do that. I, I love to pick other people’s brains and find out what works for them and fascinatingly enough, it’s always different. So I think being open to all types of communication in different relationships, you’re gonna communicate with your spouse differently than you are your coworkers, I hope.

JW:
Well, if not, we got an HR problem. That’s all I can tell you, right?

LF:
Yeah. Take it up with HR.

JW:
Can I get you to make a copy, honey? I mean, come on. That’s gonna get you in trouble, Lori. I don’t know where you work.

LF:
That’s definitely gonna get me in trouble. So, but I, I do. I think communication is definitely a great third cornerstone of this conversation this morning, but I need to know what’s number four. But

JW:
Before I go, let, let me explain one thing about the generations you hit on it. Let me help clarify something. So we’ve got some gen Zs in our office. I’ve got some gen Ys in the office and I have found, so keep in mind, I’m one of those guys right below the baby boomers. So I came right after the baby boomers and my communication approach is a little different than those in the younger age groups, because let explain one thing a client of ours. I sent an email to one of my, my dear colleagues. That’s a, a gen Z. So, and it was an all caps. So let me mention it. It was all caps. Her understanding was, well, why is he yelling at me? What did have, I see what I’m saying? That’s her perception. Yes. What have I done wrong? That would cause someone to yell an entire email at me.

JW:
And she came to me and she thought that she had upset a client to so such a degree. Now his words, when she was reading them, weren’t harsh. They weren’t profane. It was just nice request. And he had a question about stuff, but he was in all caps and she came to me and she said, I don’t know. I made Mr. So-And-So upset about something. And I said, well, why do you mean that? She said, well, look at his email. And she took me to her office and I looked at the email. I started laughing. I said, I can tell you what he couldn’t find his bifocal. So he made big letters. So he no seriously. So he had no intent. So you see what happens, that’s miscommunication. He had no intent and she immediately took it as a negative because his all caps were what he could see. Isn’t that funny.

LF:
Well, and I think it’s, it, it, you’re absolutely right. It’s generational. And we have to do better to constantly learn. I think I probably would’ve taken an all caps email the same way I, in my mind, I would’ve thought, oh my goodness, what have I done to offend this person? You know, cause again, you can’t decipher tone in a text or an email, but the perception is there that, that she immediately went to thinking, oh, what have I done? Why would someone send me something in all cap?

JW:
So let me tell you one of my worst fears, Lori came to light and then we’re gonna get to the fourth cornerstone. When it comes to communication. I use emojis a lot just to kind of Quicken the conversation. You know, I’ve down to my last few words for the 5,000 I had that day. And you know, here I send an emoji. If I don’t have my glasses on, cuz I, I can see, I just can’t see up close. You know, they have these hand emojis. Now I thought I was given a thumbs up and I sent a dirty word.

LF:
No!

JW:
…To my wife. She said, she sent back this look, you know, I could see the face on hers. It was like, oh, with the mouth wide open, shocked eyes open. And I’m like, well, what in, where else? I put my glasses on? I went, oh my goodness, this is gonna cost me. And I deleted it from my, my, you know, from my text side. But it stays on the other persons. Right?

LF:
It does, it does! I know!

JW:
As soon as I got home, she said, do you want to explain this? And I said, absolutely I do right now. And I will tell you what I did. So I got down on one knee as you should, gentlemen, as you, you know, we’re in the doghouse at that point. Right? And so I got down on one knee and I said, sweetheart, I didn’t even have my glasses on. I thought I was giving you the thumbs up instead. I gave you the finger out and it was not good. I don’t condone it. I don’t encourage it. It just happens. So I said to myself, why do they have those blasted nasty ones on the phone? What purpose can it be? So anyway.

LF:
Not good, not good.

JW:
Not good.

JW:
Imagine that had been my favorite client or somebody, you know? Right. I could get my wife to forgive easier and I probably could anybody else, you know, because she cheated on me with the ice cream deal. But so I’m holding it over her more. I’m holding it over her stomach. But anyway, so my point here is, is I’m going, can I get rid of these? So I actually sent an email to the folks that I thought took care of the emojis on, on, you know, the phones and the folks at apple didn’t seem to understand what I was getting at. So they said, you just don’t get to choose which ones you want. I’m like, oh great. So anyway, communication folks, it’s the big, big, big cornerstone.

LF:
So in saying that now everyone has been scarred for life. Because if you get an emoji text from Jimmy, you’re just gonna have to take it for a grain of salt and know that if it’s inappropriate, he sent it up the chain to apple and they said, tough deal with it.

JW:
Yeah. And Jimmy didn’t have his glasses on when he sent it. I sure you, there was no means of harm included.

LF:
So, so Jimmy, tell us about the fourth cornerstone. And hopefully it doesn’t involve dirty emojis.

JW:
No, no, no. I thank you for that. This is one of my favorite of the four. It really is because this world is full of what I call fake people now don’t I don’t mean that as they usually don’t give you their true emotions sometimes. Oh yeah. How you doing, how you doing and inside their dying something’s happened. I’m looking at the word and I’m going, I know what the fourth cornerstone is to a successful relationship that you want to go long term with that. I mean, you’re all in is sincerity. Think about this. If you’re not sincere to the people you are meeting, spending time with and talking, they know it. And I’m gonna tell you who’s the best at this, those gen Z and gen Y kids. They’re not kids give adults that we have hired. Now the young professionals they know when you’re trying to fake ’em out, don’t even try it. Lori. They’re good.

LF:
They are good. I mean, it’s, it’s almost like it’s crazy. They’ll call you on it too. They don’t hesitate. And that’s great. And I wish we could all be more like that. I, I tell people all the time, I, I love to work with young people because they will, they will literally call you out on it and say, wait a minute. No, wait, what? No, we’re not doing that. And I find what I find is so difficult for me in that situation of sincerity with relationships is that I am constantly equating that with distraction. I have really tried to focus hard on when I’m working with someone or I’m with someone, you know, to give them my utmost attention. Because typically the phone’s ringing, the email is dinging. The text messages are going off and it’s really easy to be having a conversation with someone that’s really important.

LF:
And you lose all sincerity when you’re distracted, it’s really hard. And it it’s just, it’s one of the most, it’s almost like the Achilles heel. It’s like, oh, I can do good at so many things. And you know, you see it all over your face. They can tell, especially the young professionals, what what’s going on, why, what, what you looking at? What’s going on? Why are you distracted? Are you listening to me? Can you hear me? Like what what’s going on? Do we need to reschedule? I, I do not wanna be that person because it, it, it is so insincere and it comes across rude and disrespectful and everybody’s time is valuable and important. And when you’re working with someone on a project or a community board or an organization, the last thing you want them to think is that you don’t really care or that you’re, you know, too busy to be there, but you’re there, you know, I’m just, I’m here in body, but I’m not here in minder spirit. And oh, it’s

JW:
Oh, I hate it when I do that. And they go, you’re here, but you’re not here. And I’ll yeah. Ah, busted. And who tells me that? My younger daughter, right? She goes, I know you’re here, dad, but you’re really not here. So I’m like, okay, how much is this gonna cost me? How much is this gonna cost me? You know, that’s a great one though, Lord, and I will say this too, this younger generation of professionals, at least in my experience, they are so keen on that. And I’m not sure where they gained that skill so early in life, but they can pick you part, for example, here’s another true story, you know, on live life, by design folks, we share the real truth. I, the unvarnished truth, what I’m sharing with you. So one day I was just probably had a lot on my mind, had a little stress on me or so forth.

JW:
And I never have a bad day at the office. I have never raised my voice. I’ve never been unkind, not intentionally to anybody for any reason, but how they knew I was under some kind of duress or had something going on that was kind of stressing me is I changed my personality. I got quiet. Now those of you didn’t know I’m on a podcast. My mouth is moving all the time, but I got quiet. And when they saw me and they noticed I was smiling, but I wasn’t saying anything or I didn’t greet them with something nice to say, they said, huh? The youngest one on my team is 22. Now she just turned that she came into my office one day, this spring and said, sit down, she’s down in the chair. Didn’t ask you things. She goes, Hey, give it up. What is it?

JW:
And I, I said, I beg your pardon. And she said, what’s your mind? What’s on your mind. Tell me what’s on your mind, said my dad gets like this all the time. And you’re a little older than him. So I figured you got something on your mind. I said, first of all I’ll send your termination letter to you, but second ago. No, I did not. You know, the one thing I did appreciate about that, I said, how did you know that she goes, well, you know my dad’s that kinda way you men don’t ever talk about things on your mind. You just kinda keep it all in. And by keeping it all in, you’re stewing it around in your brain by being quiet. And I told her, I said, her name’s Shelby. And I said, Shelby, you are very astute. That for a girl, 22 years of age, I thought, and she’s only worked with us for two years, but she’s already got me tuned in man.

JW:
She knows. And she said, I can tell, you know, she said 99.9% of the time you are on cloud nine. And when I see you quiet, I know something’s brewing and what can I do to help? And I said, I appreciate it, but this is something I’ve gotta do. Put the, do not disturb sign on my door. Give me about two hours of free time to myself. And I’ll solve this and be back to smiling, you know? And it’s just one of those things. So the world’s not always returning than the way we wish. And it’s not always where you’re gonna be on cloud nine. I’m up there about 29 days outta 30 I’m up there probably 364 out of a year. But there’s that one day it’s kinda like rubbing the cat wrong. You ever have that, you know, you go up to your cat, you start at the tail and you just rough the hair up. And that cat looks at you like, oh, you’re gonna pay for this when you’re asleep and they get the claws out and come right anyway. That’s how you feel certain days of the year, perhaps I won’t say the week per the year. Cause I don’t want that frequency. And so what I want you to take from this is, is there are four big powerful words to describe a true foundation for the cornerstones of a friendship. And so Lori, they are trust what was yours?

LF:
Empathy.

JW:
And then I had communication and you had

LF:
Sincerity.

JW:
Yes. So those four are big. Now I wanna talk. And Lori and I are gonna share with you cuz here’s what you take those four cornerstones and do in life. There are certain relationships, even those possessing, the traits we just mentioned, there are certain relationships at which you could spend all week with. There are some you could spend all month with, there are some you could only spend maybe a half a day with, and maybe there’s some, you could only spend few minutes with and I’m not trying to be mean, but there are certain people, you know, I I’ve got loved ones. I just love them. But they are just so negative. And I just, you know, don’t take us wrong. Have you ever seen like a volleyball with a hole in it and you go to church and you got the group out there all by the net and you getting ready to hit it in his thuds. That’s how I feel with spending with one of my relatives after that few minutes, man, I feel like the whole enthusiasm has been sucked outta my body. And I’m just like, and you know my brain, you can tell, I know she sees it. My brain’s going, let’s get outta here, get outta here. And you hear this little siren, get off my head going.

JW:
It’s like time out, get outta here. Do you ever have that situation in a relationship? And

LF:
It’s so true. I, I had a, I had, I do, I do have a family member that, that is exactly it’s like wrong and

JW:
No, no we’re not related. Are we Lori? We’re two different people. Okay.

LF:
Two different people. I totally can relate to that. And it really will. It will deflate every sense of motivation and positivity that you have. And you can be the most positive, upbeat person and love that person through it. And they are still going to be that person. And that’s okay because the world is full of people and we’re all different. And that’s what, you know, brings us all to together in a sense. But I have a, I have a professional relationship, a working relationship that it just was never going to work. No matter what I did it, it, no matter how I communicated over communicated, undercommunicated I could be the most sincere empathetic I could listen. It, it just was never going to work and it’s very much pleasantries very much when we’re around the table and we’re working on a project I know my role, they know their role and we just, that’s what we do.

LF:
And it’s okay. It’s okay. Not to have 5 million successful relationships. I mean, it would be almost impossible to think that we’re going to be able to sustain those types of relationships and you really, you struggle and you want to make that work because as people were drawn to other people, we want good things. We want positive things, but it’s also okay to okay to know that in some relationships they are strictly professional or very, you know, if it’s a family gathering, it’s like, okay, well I’m here. I came, I saw I conquered. I’m leaving. So you don’t have to be realistic to yourself.

JW:
That’s exactly realistic. And that’s what people come to relationships with expectations. I say, oh, this is gonna be rainbows. And butterflies and marriage is just love all the time. You don’t even need to eat food. You just live on love. You know, that sound like my aunt, when I got married, you just live on love. You you’d be all right. Anyway, my point I’m making there is, is that you do have these expectations that you build up into people that goodness gracious, Superman. If he were a true person, couldn’t live up to these expectations, right? And we are expecting people of just the same world. We live the same fact patterns. We deal with the same consequences we deal with. And we expect him to be just, you know, well, the world’s nothing but great. And I don’t want to come across that.

JW:
I’m not positive cuz that’s my nature. I’m very, very positive. However, these people are the kinds of people that I wanna spend about 15 minutes with maybe 30 minutes. And I go there and don’t laugh folks. Here’s what I do. I just shake it off and leave it in that doorway that I just walk through without them, I’m not doing it in front of the family member, but I just go, oh, I gotta go. And, and I listen to some Zig Ziegler. I’ll get out some of my Jim RO CDs. I got CDs. You know, Lori, that’s a little plastic thing round flat.

LF:
Yeah, yep.

JW:
Well, I know you’re a Bluetooth kind of girl. But anyway, so it matches her eyes folks. But anyway, no. So the point I’m making with all this is, is the four cornerstones of trust, empathy, communication, and sincerity are what you really must possess. If you truly want a relationship that is long term. And Lori give us the challenge for this week to our listeners and close this show out.

LF:
Okay? So the challenge this week is to take a relationship, can be personal, can be professional, can be community, take one relationship in your life and really focus on implementing the four cornerstones this week. Not saying that you have to implement all four, unless you’re an overachiever like Jimmy, you can,

JW:
It could be pathetic on one. If you wanna be pathetic on one.

LF:
Take one of those and implement that into your relationship and try to make it positive because that’s what we’re here to do on Live a Life By Design. We want you to go out, have a great week and continue to make positive strides in your life. So go out, have a great week and live a life by design.

JW:
Oh, that’s good. I love that part. Lori, everybody Live a Life By Design, I love it. Have a great week. Everyone. We’ll see you here next Monday with a smile on our face. Peace to all. Bye-bye.

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